


jungle fever!

by minhyukwithagun (deadlylampshades)



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: + several other cameos, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe where Hyungwon is a Travel Agent, Humor, M/M, Slow Burn, features other mx members as side characters, just... lots of banter
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-20
Updated: 2018-02-09
Packaged: 2019-02-04 20:19:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 31,954
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12778731
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deadlylampshades/pseuds/minhyukwithagun
Summary: "We're gonna die in this fucking jungle and I'm stuck withyou," Minhyuk said, distastefully.Hyungwon took offense at that. "It's not a jungle, it's a forest, you uncultured fuck.""Does the word choice matter? We're still going to die in it."OR:Hyungwon is an unwilling tour guide lost in the wilderness with only a single member of his tour group - a certain impetuous Lee Minhyuk.





	1. Switchback

**Author's Note:**

> hello and welcome to the "hyunghyuk gets lost in the wilderness" au!!
> 
> my eternal gratitude to the best beta in the world, steph! <3

Hyungwon found himself wondering if this was the office he’d have now – a sprawling one with glass windows overlooking the city that always had the perfect view of the morning sun. Seventh floor was a good floor - wasn’t seven one of those lucky numbers? It would suit him, he thought. Though, if he were to make some changes, he’d move that bookshelf to the east wall, and rather put a heater there–

“Hyungwon, sit down. You’re looking well,” Mr Kim commented, gesturing to the chair in front of his desk.  “It’s always good to see you’re wearing the suit, I do think they’re the best idea to come from our marketing department.”

At first Hyungwon adored the red suits that the company made him wear since their rebranding - they did suit his figure after all - but he was fast growing to hate them. They were far too restrictive - and too ostentatious, with their bright red sheen and Hyungwon’s height, he felt like he was a walking traffic light. 

“Hyungwon, I’ll get to the point. As you know, we have new management. Things are changing,” Mr Kim said clearing his throat and Hyungwon fixed his gaze on his boss. “We at Getaway want to really market to the millennials, you know.”

‘Getaway’ had always focused on the market of rich old folks with a penchant for expensive vacations – but Hyungwon wasn’t privy to the kind of data the board of directors had. Not yet, anyway – it was a matter of a few moments until Mr Kim confirmed his promotion. 

“Of course, of course, I read the briefing. Do the millennials have money for luxury vacations, though?” Hyungwon asked, thinking about his own dire financial situation as a millennial, and the occasional dilemma he faces when contemplating if eating WooWoo’s fish food counts as nutrition.

Well, not for long anyway, he was expecting a pay rise fatter than his di–

“To be blunt, no,” Mr Kim interrupted Hyungwon’s thoughts. “That’s why we have a new angle: low price holidays to remote, cheap areas. We want to emphasize disconnecting from working life!” Mr Kim’s smile was wide now and his eyes seemed to sparkle at his own words. “We want to emphasize camaraderie! Fun! Recreational sex! Really getting into the hearts and souls of these millennials.”

Hyungwon choked but managed to pass it off as a light cough.

Mr Kim opened his laptop. “As you can guess, because these areas are so isolated, we don’t have to worry about big money sinks like, you know, airport taxes. Accommodation. Food.”

“That sounds… interesting.” Hyungwon decided that interesting was the right word. He could see where Mr Kim was coming from objectively, but at the same time, Hyungwon was reasonably sure that he, personally, would die if he was left without an internet connection for longer than twelve hours. It was hard to imagine a particularly high demand from his own age group to willingly give up internet access in the name of ‘relaxation’.

“I’ve talked it over with the board, and they’re quite happy with it. Want to see our new logo?”

_Getaway for the Go-getters!_

_For when you gotta get away and go!_

The board really went and approved this attack on the letter G? Unbelievable.

“That’s a lot of repetition of the word ‘go’,” Hyungwon remarked as he looked at the screen. “It’s… catchy, at least.”

 “So, naturally, there’ll be changes around the company,” Mr Kim hammered on, ignoring Hyungwon's pondering. “But with change comes…” he trailed off.

“Cash in hand?”

“Opportunity, Hyungwon, opportunity,” Mr Kim corrected, a gentle smile on his face. “And I have a great opportunity for you. The best of your life, I’d say. I remember when I was a young upstart like you, desperate for a chance. I would have killed for something like this. I was at the tender age of twenty four when I made my big break, it was an Autumn day when I was called into the office of my boss-”

Hyungwon decided that after Mr Kim confirms the promotion, the first thing he’ll do is ditch the red suit. Maybe on a beach, preferably on a bonfire.

The second thing he’d get is a secretary. An attractive one, just like the kind in the movies, named something foreign and sexy like… Angelique. Yeah, that sounds good.

Cigars would be a good thing to take up as well. He hated smoking, and the one and only time he tried weed in college, he nearly choked and died – so maybe not cigars exactly...

Chewing tobacco? He’d have to deliberate over that.

He’d need to take a lover, preferably not his secretary, because she had to be his mistress later. Ugh, that would mean dating again, that would be quite a lot of effort.

Hyungwon had planned this out since he was eighteen, tying his tie for his high school graduation. This was the culmination of years of working hard, and keeping his head down. This was the beginning of Hyungwon's peak.

Mr Kim wiped a tear from his eye and coughed theatrically. “Sorry, I get choked up thinking about my humble beginnings sometimes. Anyway, Hyungwon, as you must have guessed by now, your position is changing. I’d like you to be on the front line of our new campaign.”

Hyungwon had always thought musicals were horribly unrealistic – he had never felt the level of joy so palpable he could want to sing. This moment changed that. Hyungwon felt as if he could be an entire orchestra right now. He could sneeze and the sound of a cello would fill the office, and rightfully so, everyone deserved to see what hard work and effort could produce.

“There’ll be a lot of changes, of course, you won’t need your old office anymore.”

It was as if Mr Kim had tapped right into Hyungwon's corporate fantasies. He hated his old office. A cubicle with dirty walls, scuffed by years of sticky tape and thumbtacks, some notices from the nineties still stuck to it from the last employee. The awful smell of overcooked food that exuded from the break room every time someone warmed up whatever concoction they brought from home would no more haunt Hyungwon's dreams. And not to mention his _colleagues_ , peeking with their heads over the cubicles, incessantly chatting about their weekend and their dogs and their weekend _with_ their dogs.

No more. A locked door and a secretary booking appointments would be Hyungwon's new best friend, and he couldn’t wait for it.

“The world will be your office now, Hyungwon, there’s so much left to do and see, and your youth will not be spent behind four walls like mine was. I see so much of myself in you, Hyungwon, tall, devilishly handsome, driven to succeed-“

“Sorry, Mr Kim, what do you mean by ‘the world will be my office’?” Hyungwon interrupted.

“We’re flipping our image. Our travel agents as nameless, faceless people who click buttons are just not doing it for the millennial crowd. We want our clients to feel like the travel agent is part of their family, albeit a part of the family that stays away in their own separate hotel room and doesn’t talk about non-family friendly topics.”

“A part of the family?”

“Exactly so. To be there, to be the best of both a travel agent _and_ a tour guide, with the expertise of both!”

Hyungwon wished he could pretend to be confused. Confusion would give him more time to process everything, give him time to think about it. More time to bury his dreams.

But he understood far too quickly. “You want me to… go out in the field? With these people? The tourists?”

“Yes!” Mr Kim exclaimed. “Exactly that! You catch on so fast, Hyungwon!” Mr Kim broke off to beam at him. “I really am so fond of you.”

Hyungwon attempted to return the smile, and only succeeded in baring his teeth, much like a confronted baboon.

“Your new duties consist of going out with the tourists, like a tour guide, but more personally connected to your group. You’ll arrange everything for them from the location, emphasizing spontaneity and their personal interests. You know how much millennials love finding hidden gems? This is an entire holiday dedicated to such a premise!”

Mr Kim looked Hyungwon up and down. “I would recommend working out, there’ll be a lot of walking. How many African languages do you know?”

“Uh. None.”

“Oh, it’s alright. You’ll learn fast enough! I’ll send you a PDF link to some good e-books,” Mr Kim said, barely pausing to breathe. “Right, so, we’ll be using you in a lot of marketing material as well. We actually have a photoshoot scheduled for tomorrow morning, so be sure to come in an hour early for hair and makeup.”

Hyungwon had taken extra time in tying his tie that morning while he flitted through ideas for his thank you speech when he got his promotion. Now, he wished he’d spent the time making a noose.

 “Mr Kim, are you quite sure I’m the best person for this? I think I work quite well behind the desk you know, my targets are the best around here.”

No one else could even come _close_ to the amount of holidays Hyungwon booked as a travel agent. He worked holidays, he worked weekends, he even took calls in his hospital bed when he had appendicitis.

“And that’s exactly why I think you need some distance from the office, Hyungwon,” Mr Kim gushed. “The others are growing complacent. In my sixteen years as the head of this company, I’ve hardly had a better employee than you - and the rest can’t keep sponging off you. They need some competition among themselves again, rather than just letting you do all the heavy lifting for them.”

Mr Kim stood up. “This move is going to be great for our company. The millennials are going to adore our new packages and you know what, they’ll adore you too!”

If Mr Kim said millennial again, Hyungwon was reasonably sure he’d fling himself out the seventh story window. 

Hyungwon's face must have betrayed his emotions because Mr Kim dropped his excitement for a moment by setting his features into a reassuring smile.

“Hyungwon,” Mr Kim said gently. “I think this will be good for you too. You’ve been at this company for nearly five years, doing the same thing. I’m unbelievably glad to have you as an employee, and I know one day you’ll be in my chair.”

 _And that day was supposed to be today_ Hyungwon thought bitterly.

“But I don’t think you’re ready. You need to go out and experience the world, Hyungwon, and I think this is the perfect opportunity for you. You may not believe me, but I think you need this.”

Hyungwon looked up and the only thing he ‘needed’ was a shot of vodka and a boss who didn’t think he was his surrogate dad. He had neither.

“Thanks Mr Kim. I won’t let you down,” Hyungwon said, not even bothering to inject fake enthusiasm into his words. “I guess I’ll… pack up? Where should I even put my things?”

“You just need a locker, now. You’ll be living out of a suitcase more often, so I’d say invest in a few good travel pillows and some sleeping pills. You have a good day now, Hyungwon, we’ll sign the papers later!”

Hyungwon left without another word, and stumbled to his cubicle, feeling more and more like a zombie. He fell into his desk chair, not even bothering to move the keyboard out of the way. The smell of overcooked ramen filled the surrounding air, and Hyungwon slumped his head into his arms.

He didn’t _deserve_ this. He worked so hard, he spent so many hours of overtime, he missed so many family events for his job. His social circle had progressively shrunk the further along he got in his job, and even now, there were very few people he could consider a close friend. He even got fucking _fish_ , just to stop his mother worrying about his social interactions.

There was no chance of him refusing the job. Mr Kim had made that abundantly clear – and Hyungwon wasn’t about to throw away five years of service for a temporary roadblock in his path to success.

He wished it didn’t hurt as much.

 

He recalled once, when on a date with a guy with startlingly blue eyes who seemed _so_ fun and _so_ interesting, the guy in question asked Hyungwon what he did for a living.

“I’m a travel agent.”

“Oh, that’s so cool! You see the world on a daily basis?”

Hyungwon had snorted. “Yeah, from Google Images. I just make the bookings. Trust me, I’m happy with it.” And then, because he had a bit to drink and felt like impressing his date, added: “I’m one of the most senior staff, you know, even though I’m one of the youngest. My boss dotes on me. It’s just a matter of time till the day I’ll own the company and buy myself a yacht. Then I’ll travel. I’ll go in style. None of this economy class bullshit.”

 

Hyungwon wanted to reach into his skull and purge the memory from his mind. Hyungwon _was_ the economy class bullshit. He _was_ what he despised. Hyungwon lightly slammed his head on the desk.

“Everything alright?”

Hyungwon lifted his head and saw Jooheon, the one who was always far too chipper and responsible for stinking up the breakroom with his lunches, leaning over and smiled. “You look a little down, my friend.”

Friend? Hyungwon probably wouldn’t be able to identify Jooheon at a police line-up. But, fucking hell, it wasn’t like he was getting sympathy from anywhere else. “I got a promotion.”

“That’s so great!” The smile on Jooheon’s face was so genuine it physically hurt. Hyungwon wished he could remove it and place it on his own face.

“No. Not great. I’m a tour guide now. I’m part of that bullshit budget travel plan–”

“Oh, the Getaways for Go-getters!” Jooheon finished and Hyungwon's eyes narrowed.

“How do you know that?”

“I also got offered that promotion! I guess we’ll be working together!”

Ah. So this is the ‘limbo’ Dante had spoken of in his Divine Comedy, this was the state of not being in Hell quite yet, but close enough to start feeling hot under the collar. How positively wonderful.

“That’s just great, Jooheon, that’s just fantastic. Great,” Hyungwon deadpanned, switching on his computer, thinking about posting something controversial on Facebook just to feel some kind of emotion other than the overwhelming numbness.

Maybe something about how dogs were smelly or that Naruto wasn’t that good. That would get people riled up.

“It’ll be okay, Hyungwon,” Jooheon said, flashing an apologetic smile. “I know you like your desk job, but it might be really cool. I heard that the first tour is in Botswana, isn’t that awesome?”

“I’ve always wanted to go to South America.” Hyungwon murmured under his breath.

Hyungwon opened a tab, and googled Botswana. Ah. Botswana was not in South America. He was thinking of Bolivia. He groaned.

“What are you typing?” Jooheon asked.

“Naruto’s overrated,” Hyungwon answered, without looking up.

“Feel like I’ll have to agree to disagree there, pal.” Jooheon said, offense vivid in his voice.

 

Hyungwon was drinking, alone, cuddled in his comforter. He had already spilled about half a glass on the thing, and it would have to be thrown in the wash the next day. For now, however, he wrapped it around him as a shield against the world, the only light coming from his laptop.

He was updating his resume as a bit of masochism, erasing his lines about his current duties with something like perverse pleasure.

“ _Lead Travel Consultant for Getaways for Go-getters_ ,” Hyungwon read aloud. “That’s me. The Go-getter. The fucking go-getter.”

He wished he had a time machine to tell his nineteen year old self that yes, he could go to Jackson Wang’s party on the rooftop because work the next day wouldn’t actually matter. He would tell his twenty-year-old self that yes, he can stay on the train till the next line to talk to that pretty girl just a little longer, and get her number, because if he was late, it would make no difference.

Most of all, he would tell his eighteen-year-old self on the day of his high school graduation to pick a different fucking career than ‘successful in business’. Whatever the fuck that meant.

Well, he was too far gone now. He boarded his ship, and was ready to sink. He was committed. He’d rather die than change jobs, the paperwork would be nightmarish – and having to meet new people? Awful. Awful, awful, awful.

He had grown satisfied with his fights on Facebook, he was done with his resume, but he’d rather die than sleep – that would mean waking up, and that would mean the photoshoot as the new poster boy.

Getaways for Go-getters.

How long did it take some fifty-year-old man in a boardroom to come up with that? Hyungwon could come up with something better on the fucking toilet.

Regardless, he’d have to get used to the name eventually.

Botswana… he let the unfamiliar name roll in his mouth. It was interesting that Jooheon already knew where the first tour was going – but then again, Hyungwon had avoided checking his emails all day. The thought of having to start making plans as a tour guide was too much for his mental stability.

 From experience, there was always a tester tour, so to speak, usually a group of friends or a company, who pay a discounted rate and go through the entire tour and give feedback. Mr Kim wouldn’t have approached Hyungwon until he had the tester tour planned out, of course. Mr Kim was thorough like that, even in the way he ruined Hyungwon's life.

That left Hyungwon with the thought that his future travel mates were already out there. He cautiously began to search on social media, finding little results until he dragged up Instagram, ignoring about five different requests from strangers to ‘slide into his DM’s’.

And there it was. Deep in Instagram, on some random stranger with the username ‘akaminhyukku’ was the damning post.

It was of two men, a redhead and a black-haired man, eagerly embracing.

 _“After a truly rough year, me and the boyzzz are gonna party it up in Botswana!!!_ Gonna be lit!! #CKKeepingItTight #GetawaysForGoGetters ”

Horrific. No man over the age of eighteen should be spelling boys with a ‘z’, least of all with _multiple_ zs.

Hyungwon could deduce the redhead was the owner of the account – and the account seemed to be far too popular for just an ordinary guy yet his description boasted no youtube channel or modelling career – he _definitely_ was an ordinary guy.

He just happened to be ridiculously attractive, and popular because of that.

He was a tattoo artist?  It seems to be the only explanation of all the pictures he uploads of needles captioned ‘yaaaas’. The man himself didn’t appear to have any tattoos, but Hyungwon was far too tipsy to care about those finer details.

Minhyuk, was his name, and he seemed to really enjoy the 100 emoji. He was not a natural redhead – he didn’t seem to be a natural anything, Hyungwon thought when he found pictures of him with blue hair. The man he was with in the first picture appeared to be some friend, and he was in several more, usually accompanied by the phrase ‘my boy CK’. The word ‘boy’ to Minhyuk appeared to be what the word ‘millennial’ was to Mr Kim.

Hyungwon decided then and there that he hated Minhyuk. Damn Minhyuk and his dumb Instagram with six thousand followers and his poor grammar and unnecessary repetitions of letters. He was even a year older than Hyungwon – as he found out from his birthday post from last year:

 _“Finally 24_ thanks to the boys (+ my girl Soyou!) for the best night out! ”

He was born in November. Hyungwon knew nothing about astrology, but that appeared to be a bad sign. He could just feel it.

Another very annoying fact was Hyungwon was _annoyingly_ attracted to him. It was the picture angles, he decided. Minhyuk was a man who knew his angles, knew exactly how to make even a dumb selfie look ridiculously sexy.

Horrible. Absolutely horrible.

Hyungwon comforted himself with the thought that he probably looked awful in reality where Instagram filters won’t save him. He was on pictures from 2013 now, and part of Hyungwon really knew he should stop stalking this random guy and go to sleep but-

Minhyuk had a picture of him next to some long-haired waif of a man and captioned it something about the weather but in the comments, he had written:

_“bae ”_

And that was fairly interesting, because up to that point there was a distinct _lack_ of romantic presence in Minhyuk's Instagram – and Hyungwon wasn’t stupid. No one that good looking was perpetually single – the obvious exception to this rule was Hyungwon himself, but he was focused on his career. He had a _reason._  

Minhyuk didn’t seem like the kind of person who was turning away suitors due to his devotion to his career as a tattoo artist - or needle-salesman? There had to be some explanation for the needles…

Hyungwon pondered at other potential professions as he drank his final sip.

So, clearly, Minhyuk purged his Instagram of couple selfies. That was just the natural order of things - but this one slipped through the cracks. Nevertheless, it revealed that he clearly dated men in the past.

Well, good for him. Welcome to the club. He wasn’t going to get any special prizes from Hyungwon for that.

Ugh, why was someone like this even _going_ to Botswana? He looked like he belonged on the beaches of Ibiza at an EDM concert, or maybe on a Mediterranean cruise.

 God, what Hyungwon wouldn’t give to be on a Mediterranean cruise, tanning on a sun lounge, sipping a martini served by that sexy secretary Angelique, and obviously, there’d have to be an equally sexy lifeguard because Hyungwon can’t swim, maybe with red hair–

Hyungwon put his glass down. His eyes drifted to the corner of his screen and not even daylight savings would have saved him from the truth that it was 4:16am. Hyungwon shut his laptop without a second thought, pulling the covers over him, trying not to think about his stupid boss, stupid job and that stupidly hot Instagram boy who got to have a holiday while Hyungwon _suffered_.

 

“Your eyes are really red, Mr Chae,” the stylist commented, as she applied blusher to his cheeks.

“I had a late night,” Hyungwon said, his eyes closed, desperately trying to get seconds of sleep, even in the makeup chair.

“So did I, Mr Chae, but I don’t smell like alcohol.”

He probably deserved the sarcasm, but damn, it stung. “I’m sorry, I just–”

“You don’t owe me an apology, Mr Chae, but the lights in the studio are very bright.”

This stylist had a damn mouth on her – but Hyungwon wouldn’t complain, just in case she decided to tell someone else about Hyungwon's liquor stained breath.

“I’ll try my best,” Hyungwon said.

“I’d recommend an aspirin.”

He was thankful for the medical advice but in his own capacity, Hyungwon would have recommended himself for a light coma. He sighed, and unlocked his phone to text Jooheon if he had any aspirin his desk. The stylist moved onto his hair now, blowing it out until it was a delicate ball of fluff.

Hyungwon couldn’t resist snapping a picture. This promotion objectively sucked, but hey, it would make a good selfie.

He noticed the new Instagram message and barely even read it – and then saw the profile picture again, the profile picture of a redhead whose face he started at for so many hours he could draw it with his eyes closed.

 _@akaminhyukku: lol hey just wanted to know you totally liked like four pictures of mine from 2013 at 3am last night. thanks for reminding me to take down that one pic of my ex but lol next time maybe don't be so obvious when you stalk, rookie_

No. No. No, no, no. That didn’t happen, Hyungwon wasn’t _that_ stupid, of course he wasn’t, he wouldn’t be the kind of idiot who would be so drunk that he’d sleepily hit the like button on year old pictures.

Hyungwon scrolled to his likes, and oh yes, he was that stupid. There was that one picture of Minhyuk with brown hair from 2013. And look, there was the one with his collarbones visible, Hyungwon remembered spending about a full minute zooming in on that one.

 Oh fuck. Oh he really fucked up.

“Mr Chae, are you alright?” his stylist asked over the roar of the hair dryer.

“Fine, absolutely fine,” Hyungwon answered, thinking about that time machine again – forget his party pooper history, he’d use it to go back and stop himself from doing _this_.

And the way Minhyuk confronted him, no less. A kissing emoji? A thank you? The diction? At least Minhyuk didn’t call him ‘boy’, he supposed, it could have been worse.

Hyungwon saw the notification that ‘akaminhyukku’ liked his latest picture and decided he knew exactly why people his age decided to take a break from society and go on remote trips to the middle of nowhere. Cavemen had the right idea. You never heard of another caveman from a different cave complaining you were looking at their wall paintings too late or you slid into their DM’s while they were at another tribe.

Not only did Minhyuk decide to follow him, he was evidently online right now and probably expected a reply.

Well, Hyungwon wasn’t going to play this game. He had dignity, or the Instagram shaped absence of dignity if nothing else, and dammit he’d honour the void it left.

He locked his phone, and spent the rest of the day focused on the photoshoot. The bright lights were indeed painful just as the stylist predicted, but Jooheon’s appearance halfway through with water and an aspirin was sorely needed.

Jooheon was kind enough not to pry into the details, and Hyungwon felt a rush of affection for his junior.

The aspirin soothed his headache and the shoot was easier than expected, a lot of requests for big smiles in front of a white backdrop.

Mr Kim arrived near the end of the shoot and seemed far too delighted at seeing Hyungwon pose under the lights. “It’s going to look so great, Hyungwon! We’re going to send it to the graphics guys, and they’re gonna add in some palm trees or a savannah. They’ll do their computer magic and you’ll look so good,” Mr Kim assured him, nodding. “Don’t forget to take pictures with the red suit as well, we’re staying on brand.”

It was incredible how Mr Kim could consistently ruin Hyungwon's life in less and less words each time. At some point Mr Kim will just walk up to Hyungwon and say ‘glaucoma’ and that would be the end of him.

Sighing, Hyungwon changed out of his ‘travel’ outfit and into the red suit. At least that was one good thing, the red suit could get burnt in a fire while he was in Botswana.

 

When Hyungwon finally was dragged out of the studio, it was only an hour left of the work day, and he dragged himself to his computer to read his emails. 

There it was: the itinerary of the Botswana trip. Hyungwon sipped on his Americano while he digested the contents of the email. He was leaving in a week, for a fortnight to Ghanzi, a town in Botswana, where they’d then travel to the forests. There was a campsite of sorts there, especially built for this new company direction. Hyungwon knew how to Google the surrounding area, and all he saw was _green_. He figured that while Mr Kim was overbearing, he was not incompetent, and that the campsite must be completed at the very least.

Jooheon was coming with him, which was a relief. Their party was only six people, thankfully small, and they were to use commercial airlines for the bulk of the trip.

That wasn’t so bad. That could be okay. Hyungwon was going to be okay. He would in the window seat next to Jooheon in the plane, and then it was just a matter of doing his usual job but in person instead of over a phone. He knew how to be charming, he knew how to make an old building or big tree sound like a must-see. He bookmarked several links on Botswana, and closed up for the day, feeling more positive than he initially thought he would.

Hyungwon had packed up for the day when Mr Kim peered out of his office. “Hyungwon, come inside for a moment? There’s someone I want you to meet."

Oh god – was it the tourist group? It was too _soon_ , it was a week before the time, and then there was the Minhyuk thing, and where was Jooheon–

Hyungwon turned the handle to Mr Kim’s office, and saw another employee, easily identified by the red suit.

Hyungwon was a man who tried not to judge people based on appearances. He much preferred to judge them on things that really mattered: like their favourite brand of watch or their bank account.

But Hyungwon found himself instantly disliking the man in front of him. First of all, no one had any business being taller than Hyungwon. He was quite content being the tallest man at Getaway, and it should _stay_ like that.

“This is Seungjun,” Mr Kim said, gesturing to the man with a smile. “He’ll be taking over your job.”

“My job?” Hyungwon asked.

“Yes, of course. Your old one. You can’t exactly be booking tours while you’re on one, now can you?” Mr Kim said, kindly patting Seungjun on the back. Seungjun appeared to look in mild pain, but forced what could be construed as a smile on his face.

“He’s new to the company, but I think he’ll fit in just fine. If you have any tips or advice you want to give him, do drop him a line.”

Hyungwon's advice would be to quit, right now, before Seungjun ends up having the best years of his youth wasted on a company managed by fifty-year-olds who learnt about the buzzword millennial yesterday and restructured their entire company around it.

“Nice to meet you, Seungjun. I take it you know where your desk is,” Hyungwon said, wishing his voice sounded less obviously filled with hatred. He tried a higher register. “It’s going to be great working with you!”

This was a bad idea, as when Seungjun started speaking his voice was even lower than Hyungwon's.

Hyungwon personally cursed every ancestor which was responsible for not giving him a voice that sounded more like gravel and less like clouds. 

“I hope I can do a good job following in your footsteps. Mr Kim tells me you were the star travel agent,” Seungjun said, bowing.

“I still am,” Hyungwon couldn’t stop himself from replying.

“Ah, it’s that kind of fire that makes me so fond of him!” Mr Kim said, clapping his hands together.

It wasn’t _fire_ that made Hyungwon a good travel agent and he prickled at the suggestion that it was. Hyungwon wasn’t intensely charismatic or persuasive - he just put in more hard work than anyone else. More hard work than this guy, clearly.

“I have a list of repeat travellers I need to give you. They have holidays at least once a year and always book it through me. I guess… you’ll take over that,” Hyungwon said.

“Your guidance will be much appreciated.” Seungjun said, bowing again.

Hyungwon escorted Seungjun to his desk, feeling rather like he was showing him the hole he’d like to be buried in. _Right here_ , he felt like saying, _just lay my corpse right on my desk, and be sure to hit me with the shovel on your way out_.

He’d never felt protective of his desk, but at the way Seungjun’s eyes swept over Hyungwon's tiny aloe plant, his wallpaper of an aquarium, and the red pen lying uncapped in his pencil holder, he felt like he was being laid out for sacrifice.

“I like your cactus,” Seungjun commented, pointing to it.

“It’s an aloe,” Hyungwon said, opening one of his drawers and taking out a file. “Well, these are the clients. Get acquainted with them. They like feeling like they have a personal relationship with you. Tell Mrs Park that you hope she’s recovered from her surgery.”

Hyungwon handed the file over to Seungjun, and every bone in his fingers begged him to take it back. The file wasn’t just a simple list of ‘repeat tourists’. That file was the combination of _hours_ of phone conversations over several years, forming painstaking relationships and bonds during the few times he ever had contact with this clients. That file was composed of people who personally requested Hyungwon, who loved him, who trusted their holidays in his _hands_. And he was just going to give it away to this random stranger who had the _nerve_ to be taller than him.

“I’m heading home now.” He paused. “Also, uh, you’re not getting my desk till I leave next week Monday,” Hyungwon said, turning away without waiting for a goodbye.

 

He caught Jooheon in the parking lot.

“Take it you saw the email? Better start packing. Mr Kim seems really set on having us out there as soon as possible,” Jooheon said, unlocking his own car.

“Mm, I did. I’ll need to buy some shorts. I suspect it’ll be hot.”

“Oh, I’m pretty sure we’re supposed to be in our red suits for the duration, actually.”

Hyungwon blinked, entirely unfazed. “Well, what’s he going to do? Email me a warning? Pity the trees don’t have Wi-Fi. Guess there’s no one to stop me from keeping my suit as a nice case filler.”

Jooheon shook his head laughing. “See you tomorrow, Hyungwon.”

And Hyungwon started feeling that if this was what work friendship could be, perhaps it wasn’t so bad after all. Maybe Mr Kim was right – he could use some digital detoxing, especially after the incidents of last night. He needed to connect with real people, and have _real_ conversations.

Maybe Botswana wouldn’t be quite so terrible.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> mr kim is jin lmao


	2. Yield

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello everyone!! so sorry for the long wait, I had finals ew, but hopefully going forward updates should be weekly. thanks to everyone who gave kudos and comments so far <3 please enjoy this bumper-sized update to make up for the wait

“Do you think I’d need to bring bubble bath?” Hyungwon said, packing the shampoo bottle in his carrier bag.

“I don’t know, man, I’ve never been to Botswana,” the cashier replied, scanning the item. “Went to Coachella once, though.”

“Did you need bubble bath?”

“Nah. Needed to get my stomach pumped, though.”

Hyungwon’s hand hesitated on the bottle.

“Actually wait, can you cancel that? I can’t fit that in my bag, that’s ridiculous.”

“Alright, sure,” the cashier said, tapping buttons on his till.

Hyungwon lasted a few seconds before adding: “Actually…”

The cashier raised an eyebrow when Hyungwon walked in at 1am, in just his Winnie the Pooh pyjamas and dropped two bottles of mosquito repellent and a packet of almonds at the till.

“So do you actually want the bubble bath, or not?”

“I’m being insane. No, I don’t want the bubble bath. But, uh, give me a moment, I need to pick up something else. I just realized I didn’t pack in any herbal teas, and _obviously_ , I can’t forget those.”

Hyungwon could swear as he left the store the cashier gave him the middle finger, and fair enough, honestly. Whatever, at least _he_ didn’t wake up in the California desert with half a bottle of piss in one hand, an empty bottle of vodka in the other, surrounded by the Coachella paramedics. 

 

It was the most recent of the several freak-outs which occurred in the prelude to Hyungwon's flight. In hindsight, perhaps he should have spent more time researching the actual country he was going to, rather than spending his last few moments of internet by bingewatching The Bachelorette but it would be fine, he figured.

Jooheon knew what was going on, and at least Hyungwon googled where the campsite was. That was better than nothing.

 

The suitcase was another problem altogether. A further email by Mr Kim, accompanied with a ‘:D' made it clear he was only allowed one suitcase and one overnight bag, and Hyungwon hadn’t really considered all the things he had to take with him. Some might call him ‘high maintenance’ in insult but he never really believed that – until he attempted to buy bubble bath at 1 in the morning, and was hit hard with a good dose of humility. He had spent the better part of Sunday night pressed on his suitcase, attempting to squash it just so the damn thing could close. He considered asking his neighbour’s five year old kid if he was willing to step on it – but finally managed to shut the wretched thing after about ten failed attempts. It was for the better that he sorted it out himself because Hyungwon wasn’t entirely sure how he would have thanked the kid. He didn’t exactly have candy in his house, would she be okay with an entire unpeeled carrot and maybe some antibacterial wet wipes?

He did end up at his other neighbour, knocking on the door, with his fishbowl in his hand. His neighbour, whose name he was desperately trying to remember as she opened the door, looking rather displeased in her dressing gown. Honey, Holly…

“Hani?” he guessed.

She raised an eyebrow. “Hello, Hyungwon. To what do I owe this pleasure?”

“Good to see you. How are you?”

“I’m fine, Hyungwon. And yourself?”

“Great. Great. How’s, uh, work?”

She _did_ have a job, right? She was a professional… something.

Hani crossed her arms, entirely unamused. “Hyungwon, why do you have a fishbowl in your hands?”

“Oh yes, the bowl,” Hyungwon looked down as WooWoo knocked against the glass. “I’m, uh, leaving for Botswana. Tomorrow. For a fortnight.” Hyungwon belatedly realized he should have brought some kind of gift. Oh, it’ll be fine, he’ll get her a keychain from the airport. “And my fish…”

A smile cracked on Hani’s face. “Oh, you want me to take care of them?”

“They’re really well behaved!” Hyungwon assured, before mentally punching himself.

“I don’t often hear of fish discipline problems,” Hani said, and to her credit she hid her laughter very well. “I’d be happy to.”

“I’ll get their food. I’m so grateful, I completely forgot there’d be no one to take care of them.”

In an impressive feat of athleticism, Hyungwon ran to his own apartment, grabbed the fish food and handed it to Hani while she was still adjusting the bowl.

“The black one is WooWoo and the gold one is FooFoo,” Hyungwon introduced. He peered into the tank as they swam around, blowing bubbles on the surface of the water. “They’re brothers. Goodbye sweeties. I’ll miss you. Be nice.”

“Two weeks, right?” Hani confirmed, a smile on her face.

Hyungwon nodded. “Yeah, it’s a work thing.”

“No worries, I’ll keep an eye on your place. Have a great trip! What I wouldn’t give for a vacation like that!”

Hyungwon privately wondered if Hani would be willing to swap positions. He’d stay at her place, looking after his fish, and she could go to the middle of nowhere and sleep next to bugs.

 

With the fish sorted, Hyungwon felt his panic start to decrease. He could do this. It was his first vacation since the ill-fated Booze Cruise of 2014, he could _totally_ do this. Even on the day he was due to leave he still hadn’t really gotten around to reading up a lot about Botswana, but there was this phenomenally long plane ride to look forward to, and anyway, half the job of being a tour guide was just presentation. He just had to _look_ like he knew what was going on. 

He dragged himself to work with dark circles under his eyes, and his suitcase in the trunk of his car.

“Jooheon, we’re meeting the group at the airport, right?” Hyungwon asked, outside Mr Kim’s office.

“Yeah,” Jooheon nodded, his hair carefully slicked back, the gel seeming to defy gravity.

“Okay, because I’m changing out of this suit the _second_ we’re on the plane. I am not sitting in this thing for fourteen hours. I refuse. I love myself too much.”

Jooheon laughed. “It’s okay, I’ll keep your cover.”

Mr Kim opened the door, grinning. He had that kind of smile that he wore whenever he announced casual Friday, the kind of smile that gave Hyungwon an overall aura of uncomfortable mixed with concern. “Well boys, are we excited?”

“Oh absolutely, Mr Kim!” Jooheon chirped.

Hyungwon fiddled with his cuff. He was not dreading it nearly as much as he thought he would, but still – having to actually _meet_ his clients was going to be quite a change. Then there was that whole… Minhyuk fiasco. Hyungwon had cleverly solved the problem by not thinking about it.

This solution was clearly not a permanent one, but Hyungwon already had the perfect strategy: deny absolutely everything. Hyungwon, awake at 4am? Never, this was a man who drank camomile tea and only went to bed at ten thirty, thank you very much enough.

“Don’t forget to maintain your professionalism now! You need to be friendly, but not _too_ friendly, now, at the end of the day they still pay you,” Mr Kim advised. “Well, I pay you. But, in a sort of indirect way, they pay you. But also, you aren’t allowed to accept tips, this isn’t some kind of prostitution ring.”

Mr Kim ran a hand through his hair. “Do read through the employee guidelines I emailed you, but just in general, avoid any too personal or controversial topics. Keep it light hearted!”

Hyungwon took one last look at his desk, and saw Seungjun staring at the keyboard, typing one letter every ten seconds. It was maddening to watch, it would be faster if Hyungwon chiseled the word out on a cave wall.

If Seungjun overwatered his aloe, he’d bleed him dry.

“Good luck, boys. Our drivers, Hyuk and Hongbin, will meet up with you in Ghanzi and they’ll take you to the campsite. I’ll keep in contact as best I can, but once you’re there, it’s all on you and your instincts. Keep the company name high, keep them having fun and keep them safe. I trust you two.”

Mr Kim gave them both a hearty pat on the back, and lingered on Hyungwon's shoulder.

“I think I’ll miss seeing you around here, Hyungwon.”

“Oh, that’s nice,” Hyungwon said, before mentally kicking himself. “Of course, I’ll miss you as well.”

He seemed genuinely touched, his hand fluttering to his chest. “You’ll have to tell me everything that happened when you get back, I look forward to your feedback. Oh, what I wouldn’t give to be a youth like you, experiencing this all over again! You stay safe now, okay? I can’t have my star employee come down with jungle fever.”

Mr Kim chucked at his own joke, closing the office door as Jooheon and Hyungwon made their way to the car park. .

The atmosphere seemed to condense with tension as they exchanged glances.

“I got you if you got me,” Jooheon finally said, holding out his hand.

“I got you,” Hyungwon said, shaking it.

 

*****

 

“Oh, that’s them,” Jooheon said, surreptitiously pointing.

“I have no idea who you could possibly be pointing at,” Hyungwon replied. “That just looks like a chair.”

“The ones over there.”

“More chairs. Nice chairs, but still chairs.”

“ _There!_ ”

“I see about a hundred people in the general direction of ‘there’.”

Jooheon groaned loudly. “Just follow me. And smile! Remember to smile.”

“I know how to do my job!”

The airport was far too busy, and far too much walking – Hyungwon was beginning to regret not following Mr Kim’s advice to work out, but in Hyungwon’s defense, he’d rather do literally anything else.

Jooheon weaved through the crowd, leading them to a group of five men. Curiously, Hyungwon distinctly remembered from the brief that one woman would be travelling with the party - but she was clearly absent from this gathering of testosterone.

“Hi there, everyone! I’m Jooheon and this is Hyungwon and we’re from Getaway!” Jooheon said, his voice effortlessly switching to his customer service tone. There was a vague chorus of greetings.

Hyungwon waved and then froze –

He locked eyes with the redhead. Well, rather _that_ redhead, the one who had no concept of spelling, the one that had haunted at least one of Hyungwon's dreams this past week and left him with the unfortunate need to launder his sheets.

And it seemed like he recognized him. Minhyuk tilted his head to the side, his eyebrows furrowing. “Where have I seen you before?”

“Anyway, it’s great meeting everyone!” Hyungwon said, quickly moving the conversation along. “But, aren’t we missing someone?”

As if on cue, the biggest man of the group immediately burst into tears and the one that Hyungwon recognized as ‘CK’ from Minhyuk's Instagram awkwardly rubbed his back.

“Uh, yeah, Soyou will not be joining us. She and Hyunwoo had a bit of a…” the man trailed off, attempting to find a euphemism before giving up. “Break up. They broke up. So we’ll be travelling as five. I’m Kihyun, by the way.”

“I just… miss her,” Hyunwoo seemed to be whimpering.

“There, there,” CK said, looking at Jooheon with an expression of panic.

“Hoseok?” Jooheon said. “Are you all ready to go to the gate?”

Hoseok, who was pushing a trolley with what appeared to be _everyone_ ’s luggage with the exception of Kihyun, who carried a trolley with one single suitcase on it, nodded. “Yeah, we’re ready to go. He’ll be okay.”

Hyungwon had attempted to keep pace with Jooheon, but he was instantly absorbed into a conversation with Hoseok. The other two continued to console the still sobbing Hyunwoo, and it left Hyungwon trailing next to Minhyuk.

Minhyuk. Goddamn Minhyuk. It appeared the redhead hadn’t figured out Hyungwon was the one behind that the Instagram stalking. The walk gave Hyungwon time to look and think about how he planned to approach this entire situation, but he found himself despairing. The worst thing about Minhyuk was that he _was_ actually more attractive in person, even under the incandescent airport lights. His red hair was far too fluffy to have been recently dyed, and he seemed to grin at everything he saw as he walked by.

Whatever.

Hyungwon was taller. That’s all that mattered.

“Have we met before?” Minhyuk asked.

“Oh, not at all.”

“Are you sure? Maybe at college, were you in any frats?”

“Most definitely not,” Hyungwon said, who spent most of his free time in university collecting Mr Kim’s groceries.

“Societies?” 

“Regrettably not. Great to meet you now though!” Hyungwon said, with a smile that would make Mr Kim proud.

Minhyuk took out his phone, presumably to check the time, but the mere sight of it – and its garish glittery case – was enough to send Hyungwon into a panic. If he checked Instagram…

“So, Minhyuk, what do you do for a living?”

“Oh,” Minhyuk said, slipping his phone into his pocket. “I’m an acupuncturist.”

The _needles_. Hyungwon breathed a sigh of relief. The pleasure of knowing the truth was far too good to be real. This was better than when he watched Game of Thrones, this was better than the end of Final Fantasy 7, this was the _ultimate_ knowledge.

So, no, he wasn’t a fucking needle-salesman.

“And the rest of your friends? Do you work together?” Hyungwon asked.

Minhyuk nodded. “Yeah, only me and Hyunwoo work together. The rest of us are all just friends. We’ve always been talking about going for a trip but we couldn’t decide on a place together, and this was cheap enough to settle decisions for us, so, here we are!” Minhyuk grinned. “I can’t wait to see the jungle.”

“It’s more of a forest,” Hyungwon automatically corrected.

“There’s a difference?”

“Well, a jungle is more of condensed foliage, almost impossible to navigate. Botswana just has large areas with trees – a forest.”

Minhyuk nodded, and it was admirable how he at least pretended to care.

“It’s definitely quite brave to be away from technology for a whole two weeks,” Hyungwon eventually said.

“Oh, we’ll be fine. We brought lots of marshmallows to roast.”

Hyungwon decided Minhyuk smiled too much to be human.

They cleared through security without too much fuss, but Hyungwon began to sweat in his suit, dreaming of changing into shorts the second he set foot on the plane.

“Don’t forget the group photo,” Hyungwon whispered into Jooheon’s ear as they stood in the lobby for boarding. “You know how Mr Kim loves to update his Facebook page.”

“Of course! Everyone, gather around! We need to document this.”

One hastily taken picture sent to Mr Kim later, they boarded the plane, and Hyungwon was looking forward to changing and taking a long nap. Mr Kim replied to the picture in typical Mr Kim fashion:

_“They look like they’re having fun!!! How great!! Thanks for letting me know!! Stay safe!! "_

“Jooheon, why are you in the row behind me?” Hyungwon asked after stuffing his duffle bag into overhead carry.

“Change of plans. The seating arrangements are being adjusted because of Soyou-” Jooheon dropped his voice, looking behind him at Hyunwoo, whose eyes were still glassy. “The seating is changed. You need to sit there with Minhyuk.”

Hyungwon's eyes widened in fear. “No, no, no, I can’t sit next to him, you don’t understand-”

Jooheon pursed his lips. “Hyungwon, I don’t mean to be rude, but we’re standing in a plane, this isn’t a time to complain about seating arrangements. It’s petty.”

“But-”

A man stuck in the aisle behind Hyungwon coughed loudly.

“Just suck it up,” Jooheon hissed, sitting down.

Ouch. It was not enjoyable to be rebuked by his subordinate.

Hyungwon shuffled into his seat – window, like he planned – and felt like chewing his nails. He was probably overreacting, it was a flight, not some kind of speed dating service. Right?

Hyungwon reached into his bag and pulled out a travel manual to Botswana – and then immediately closed it, realizing how concerning it would be to see your tour guide read about the country you were currently flying to. It would be like if the pilot took a quick break to flip to the quick start guide of the plane.

Well, that cancels out _that_ plan. Sleep then, he decided.

Minhyuk clambered in next to Hyungwon, shaking the seats an unnecessary amount. “God, I hate flying, don’t you?”

“I’m growing to,” Hyungwon replied, faintly, thinking that his flight partner starting a conversation was a very bad sign of things to come.

“Sorry, I just realized I didn’t catch your name?” Minhyuk said holding out his hand. It was perfectly manicured, geez? How much did acupuncturists even make?

Hyungwon briefly considered a fake name, but decided against it. “Hyungwon,” he said, shaking Minhyuk's hand. It was so soft, so nice to touch. Horrible.

“Hyungwon…” Minhyuk mused, leaning back in his chair.

“I’d recommend you do your last emails checks and Facebook posts. After the plane leaves, it’ll be radio silence,” Jooheon advised from the row behind. He was seated next to CK, who appeared to look vaguely pissed off.

Hyungwon really needed to find out what CK stood for at some point. He took out his phone and typed out a Facebook message, and then texted his mom.

“Shall we take a pic together?” Minhyuk asked.

“Uh. Yeah, sure,” Hyungwon said, patting his hair down. He smiled at Minhyuk's camera and a part of him felt he wanted that selfie to be immortalized as the moment before everything would go to shit.

Hyungwon's mom was texting him back now, some very aggressive things like “ _why didn’t you tell me you were leaving the country?”_ and “ _did you remember to call your uncle? He’s got shingles again”_ and attempted to placate her using as many comforting emojis as possible.

“Say, Hyungwon, you wouldn’t happen to be on Instagram would you?” Minhyuk asked.

“Yeah, I’m ‘chae.hyungwons’,” he said, unthinkingly, and then looked up from his phone, to stare straight at Minhyuk, whose eyes were sparkling with realization.

“I knew you looked familiar,” Minhyuk said grinning far too widely.

“I… don’t know what you’re referring to,” Hyungwon said, carefully keeping his face as blank as possible.

“Oh I think you do.” Giggles began to erupt. “God, this makes so much sense, that’s why I recognized you. I wasn’t used to your hair flat.” Minhyuk sounded far too pleased with himself. “It’s so good to meet my Instagram Stalker in person.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. You know a _lot_ of people use my pictures to catfish. Once had a girl come up to me claiming we were engaged and I didn’t even know her,” Hyungwon said, clicking his teeth in sympathy.

“That’s certainly interesting, and I do feel sorry for her but - here’s our direct message history. Look, you didn’t even reply,” Minhyuk pouted.

Hyungwon sighed. They could argue this for the entire duration of the flight and it wouldn’t make the truth any less damning. “Okay, okay it’s me. I’m… sorry.”

Minhyuk laughed, far too loudly, and the woman in the row in front shushed him. “Look, I don’t mind, but I need to know why. How did you even find me?”

Hyungwon looked outside the window, hoping perhaps they had found a talking pigeon of some sorts on the runway that could be a conversation piece.

“I just wanted to see who was interested in my company’s new package and I wanted to know who went for it. I just happened to come across your post.”

“And then decided just to go that extra mile and find out what I’ve been doing for the past few years?”

Hyungwon deserved this. He really did. He knew he deserved this, but it didn’t make it any easier, it just made the torture that slightly more painful. “I guess I just got a bit… distracted. You seem to have a fun life.”

A snort escaped Minhyuk. “It’s Instagram, Hyungwon, don’t be naïve,” Minhyuk paused. “Well, I’m glad this mystery was solved. I spent the week wondering exactly what I did to deserve this trip down the 2013 memory lane.”

Oh. Hyungwon felt almost bad for reminding Minhyuk about his ex with his careless liking.

“That collarbone picture was so good though, wasn’t it? I had Kihyun photograph that for me.”

Hyungwon flushed. “Just… please let’s forget about it.”

“Of course. I’m merciful like that.”

The engine of the plane roared to life and Minhyuk craned his neck over, looking out the window. “Oh, this is always the exciting part!”

Hyungwon would disagree. The exciting part was when they reached cruising altitude, and Hyungwon excused himself to the lavatory to change into his shorts and t-shirt. He noticed Jooheon and CK involved in a conversation, and the other three members of their party all watching a show on their screens.

Hyungwon slid past Minhyuk into his seat and the corners of Minhyuk's lips curled into a smile.

“Nice knees.”

“What’s wrong with them?!” Hyungwon said, covering them.

“Nothing! They’re so knobbly. It’s cute.”

“I have never heard the word knobbly ever used to refer to something cute. Only bunions,” Hyungwon replied, putting his earphones on. Minhyuk was still looking at him, and Hyungwon slipped an ear out. “Was there something else?”

“Nothing. I just wanted to know what you were planning to watch.”

“Uh, I hadn’t thought about it. Probably a reality show?”

“Antiques Roadshow always gets my blood pounding,” Minhyuk recommended.

“I’ll give it a try,” Hyungwon said.

Minhyuk held his gaze for a moment before turning to the screen.

The problem with planes, Hyungwon decided, was that because they were so cramped, everything felt too intimate. Even a simple thing like recommending a TV show felt too laced with tension, whereas in a normal environment, it would be entirely trivial. Hyungwon could understand why people could dramatically fall in love on planes now. It was just a question of personal space – that was all.

At some point during the inflight dinner, Jooheon slipped him a note through the crevices of the seat.

_Everything okay there?_

What an interesting choice of word: ‘okay’. Hyungwon took out a pen from his bag and wrote back.

_Yeah, so far so good._

The evening passed on the plane with no further incidents, Minhyuk was wrapped up in his TV show, his facial expressions a journey of itself. Hyungwon reminded himself to stop staring.

At some point, he felt his eyes closing, and rearranged his neck pillow, ready to dream he was actually on that Mediterranean cruise with Angelique, who he now decided was blonde. He may as well begin to flesh out the details of this fantasy, it was going to be his saving grace in the days to come.

In his half-dream, half-fantasy, Angelique was bringing him a cup of coffee, which didn’t seem to fit his cruise aesthetic but Hyungwon didn’t deny the warmth it brought as he slurped it down. Something soft and gentle was around Hyungwon's neck. The quality on this neck pillow was _incredible_ , it was nicer than his own pillow at home.

Hyungwon's eyes shot open as he turned, barely, as the thing that was blocking him from turning was also the source of warmth: Minhyuk. His head was lolled onto Hyungwon's shoulder, entirely asleep, little more than a ragdoll.

“Oh god.” Hyungwon whispered. He didn’t want to wake him but he couldn’t have him _sleeping_ on him. It was probably _definitely_ against employee protocol. Hyungwon didn’t actually _read_ the employee protocol guidelines Mr Kim had sent him, but he was reasonably sure casual plane cuddling was _not_ allowed.

Hyungwon attempted to shimmy in his seat till he was as close to the window as possible, but Minhyuk made a squeaking noise in his sleep, and just positioned his head closer. Oh dammit. This was all Jooheon’s fault.

He tried to relax and just deal with it – Minhyuk was a warm presence, if nothing else, but he just felt his blood pressure rise, and Hyungwon ended up spending his precious sleeping hours as little more than a stiff mannequin.

Time felt somewhat unreal as hours blurred into endless episodes of Antiques Roadshow, but eventually Minhyuk's neck rubbed against his shoulder and his eyes opened. Yawning, he looked up.

“Oh… man. I am… so sorry…” Minhyuk said, his eyes growing wider, his voice thick with sleep. It was husky, yet somewhat on the side of cute - in the way chain smoking grandmothers sounded cute.

“Oh don’t worry about it,” Hyungwon said, sounding extremely _not asleep_. Oh god he’s going to think he watched him sleep, won’t he?

 _Well you did_ he reminded himself and then decided to shut himself up.

“Just push me off next time, honestly, I’m a bit of a cuddler,” Minhyuk said, moving his head off Hyungwon's shoulder. “You can ask Changkyun, it’s quite a problem.”

“Changkyun!” Hyungwon exclaimed, far too loudly. “Shit, sorry, I just – that’s his name. Changkyun.”

So CK didn’t stand for Calvin Klein. Worth knowing.

Minhyuk looked at Hyungwon curiously. “It is.”

“I… forgot.”

“I always thought tour guides would be more professional, yet the one next to me is wearing shorts and can’t remember the names of the people he’s taking care of,” Minhyuk remarked.

And Hyungwon probably shouldn’t have taken the bait, but his pride flashed with hurt: “Oh I do apologize. I’d hate for you to have anything less than a stellar trip, especially since all I wish is to represent my company in the best way I can.”

“You’re certainly loyal.”

“I strive to go above and beyond, even going so far as searching on social media to see the public’s perception of Getaway,” Hyungwon said, nodding seriously, vaguely thinking that he truly had a future on the board of directors if he could keep up this level of bullshit.

“That’s a really fancy way of saying you think I’m cute,” Minhyuk replied. “But I’ll leave you to your sleep. I’m going to get back to Antiques Roadshow though. They’ve got some fascinating items this episode,” Minhyuk adjusted his earphones. There was something nice about the way his hair curled when it was messy.

Hyungwon sneaked a glance at Minhyuk’s screen.

“I’d pay double,” Hyungwon remarked and Minhyuk laughed, his eyes crinkling.

Ugh. Planes. Making people have weird thoughts.

Hyungwon closed his eyes.

 

Hyungwon had been too kind initially. Flying wasn’t bearable in the slightest – rather, it was absolutely horrible and quite possibly the worst invention of the modern era. That, and like, bombs in general. How did Hyungwon have clients who booked yearly holidays when flying was this bad? Were they all into the masochism or did they just fly while incredibly drunk?

His ears throbbed and his eyes felt drier than the sandwich he had for breakfast.

“How many hours left?” Minhyuk said, and Hyungwon had all but forgotten the man next to him.

“Uh… I don’t know. We’ve passed so many timezones. Maybe like six?” Hyungwon murmured.

“Why don’t you know? Isn’t it your job to know? My ass is sore,” Minhyuk was openly whining. 

Hyungwon raised an eyebrow. He was a tour guide, not a surrogate mother. But Hyungwon kept the comment to himself, he had already broken about ten professionalism rules and wasn’t about to get it to eleven before the sun finished rising.

“Four hours,” he said after checking.

“I’m bored, Hyungwon,” Minhyuk grumbled.

“Weren’t you watching Come Dine With Me?”

“I’m tired too. Come on, aren’t you bored too?” he prodded.

Hyungwon sighed. “Yes, but there’s not much we can do.”

“Want to play Rock, Paper, Scissors?”

“I’d prefer not to.”

 

“Scissors! I win! _Ha_!” Hyungwon said, rather loudly, just as Jooheon walked past him, shooting a dirty look.

Jooheon looked down at Minhyuk. “Would you like to sit next to Changkyun for a bit? I just need to go over some itinerary details with Hyungwon.”

Minhyuk got up, but he didn’t sit next to Changkyun, preferring to squeeze himself on Hyunwoo’s lap. He instantly was absorbed into a conversation with him, his eyes lighting up. 

“How are you keeping up?” Jooheon asked, his voice low.

“Not good,” Hyungwon said truthfully. “This flight is far too long. I’ll be suggesting to Mr Kim he should break it up. Stop-over in Dubai or something.”

“How’s Minhyuk?”

“Annoying. How’s Changkyun?”

“He’s… fine but…” Jooheon gestured to his white shirt, stained with purple. “He spilled wine on me. I guess it’s his first time drinking on a plane because he wouldn’t _stop_ ordering glass after glass. I’m trying not to freak out but what will the drivers think? What if Mr Kim sees in one of the pictures? He’ll think I was drinking on the plane and all I had was tea!”

“Do you have any spare shirts?”

Jooheon shook his head. “Only in the cargo.”

Hyungwon pursed his lips, deciding right then and there how far he wanted this friendship to go. If this job was to be permanent, he could use someone like Jooheon in his corner – and he was growing fond of him, in a sort of friendly way. Friendship, it was probably called.

“Don’t worry about. Here,” Hyungwon said gesturing to himself. “Take my t-shirt. My dress shirt is way too tight for you..”

Jooheon seemed stricken. “Hyungwon, I can’t. You hate wearing the shirt and tie.”

He did. “Don’t worry about it.”

Jooheon’s face softened. “That’s really nice of you, man.”

Hyungwon sat up, and peeked over the seats and saw Kihyun and Hoseok avidly chatting while in the line.

“The line for the bathroom is incredibly long though,” Jooheon advised.

“Look, let’s just change here, quickly. No one will see.” Hyungwon said, cringing internally. This was fast going into one of the most awkward moments of his life.

“Uh, I’ll… cover my eyes?” Jooheon said, shutting them entirely.

Hyungwon grabbed his dress shirt out of his duffle bag, and in record time pulled off his own shirt.

Of course, because it was a cramped plane, because Minhyuk had the attention span of about four minutes and six seconds, and because there was an unforgiving god in Hyungwon's life, it was at this exact moment that Minhyuk stood up, and looked down at Hyungwon.

“Oh, is this view included in our holiday package?” Minhyuk said, very deliberately staring, eyelashes fluttering, and Hyungwon resisted the urge to cover his chest like an elderly woman being intruded upon at a dressing room at the beach.

He buttoned the shirt and snapped his fingers in front of Jooheon. “Here. Go change.”

Jooheon looked from Hyungwon to Minhyuk and blushed. “Thanks Hyungwon, I’ll get going.”

Minhyuk slid into the vacant place. “Mind telling me what that was for, or are you just an exhibitionist in the air?”

Hyungwon scowled. “You didn’t have to stare.”

“You didn’t have to change in public.”

“Jooheon’s shirt got messed up. That’s all.” Hyungwon neglected to add it was Changkyun’s fault.

“That’s rather nice of you.”

Hyungwon had been expecting further teasing, perhaps a choice comment about his nipples, not a compliment.

At least once they touch down in Botswana, he’d be among the other tourists as well, and with Jooheon. Mr Kim had emphasized giving the tourists personal time and space, and Hyungwon was far too happy with this. Hyungwon would happily give Minhyuk the entire country to himself if it meant Hyungwon wouldn’t have to play another game of _fucking_ rock, paper, scissors.

 It was jarring.  Hyungwon made about one friend every two years and in the span of about a day, he had gotten far too acquainted with Minhyuk – for one, they’ve technically already slept together and he saw Hyungwon shirtless.

 “It’s so funny seeing Changkyun sleep off a hangover on a plane. I took like twenty pictures of him, this is going to be blackmail for the next fifty years,” Minhyuk said, a positively demonic smirk on his face.

“Oh, you know?”

“Of course I know, that’s my _son_. I felt a disturbance in the void.”

Hyungwon raised an eyebrow.

“Nah, I just heard him throw up. It was so hilarious.”

“Anyway, come on back to rock, paper, scissors. I know I’m gonna win this time,” Minhyuk said, pulling out his fist.

 

Hyungwon was in the bathroom, desperately trying to spray on dry shampoo and drag a comb through the nest that became his hair. He had changed into the red suit now, having noticed the drivers wearing them as well, and tried to look less… awful. It was difficult. Planes were unkind to Hyungwon and his pores.

Jooheon was outside with the drivers and the rest of the party, Hyungwon having excused himself to do his ‘touch ups’.

Setting foot on land after a fourteen hour flight led Hyungwon to feeling near aroused by gravity. He just wanted to lie down on the ground for a good few hours at the very least. The heat already clawed at Hyungwon's skin.

Hyungwon groaned loudly at the mirror upon noticing the sweat condensing at the back of his neck. He rushed into the bathroom stall to mop his collar up with some toilet paper, the stall door closing behind him.

The bathroom door opened, and Changkyun’s voice filled the room.

“Where is he? It’s so noisy in this airport.”

“Maybe he’s in another bathroom? He seemed in a rush.” That was Minhyuk's voice. “Oh, look, someone left their dry shampoo here! Don’t mind if I do.”

“Don’t use stranger’s shampoo, Minhyuk, what the fuck?”

 _Yeah Minhyuk, what the fuck?_ Hyungwon thought.

“Speaking of strangers,” Minhyuk said, his voice falsely casual. “Have you spoken to your parents yet?”

There was a prolonged pause and Hyungwon got the distinct impression he should not be overhearing this conversation.

“I’m not talking to you about this, Minhyuk. I made it fairly clear when we left. I’m done with this conversation.”

“You can’t just ignore this, we need to talk about it.”

“Actually, _we_ don’t.”

“Changkyun, you can’t just shut out your family like this.”

“Watch me.”

Changkyun’s tone was sharp. Hyungwon really felt like he should have revealed himself when they walked in but by now it was too late and Hyungwon _knew_ that.

“Changkyun, I’m just worried-”

Changkyun cut him off before he said another word. “Minhyuk, no. Just... stop. Stop trying to intrude in my life all the time, and focus on yourself for once? Just because your own life has stagnated to a swamp doesn’t mean that you can just play around in mine. I can take care of myself, I’m _not_ your kid.”

“Excuse me?”

The inflection resounded across the bathroom.

“Everyone else is moving on and making progress with their lives, except you, and you _know_ it. Hyunwoo and Soyou were _so_ serious with each other, Kihyun got that promotion last week and we both know about Hoseok’s plans. You know why we’ve never had a holiday like this before? Because we’re all always busy besides you! You’re the only one who just has this kind of free time to throw away, and you’re the only one who keeps wanting to _interfere_.”

“You need to stop avoiding your problems,” Minhyuk said, his voice eerily calm. “You’re not always going to be able to use me as your verbal punching bag when someone confronts you in the future. I’m not always going to be here.”

There was a pause, and the atmosphere felt thick with tension as the heat pressed down on them.

Changkyun scoffed. “You know what? I don’t need to take this.”

The bathroom door swung open and someone stormed out. 

It was only one set of footsteps, and Hyungwon peered over the top of the stall to observe Minhyuk furiously wiping at his eyes. 

Minhyuk took another look at the dry shampoo can, paused, and threw it to the side of the wall, before storming out himself.

Hyungwon breathed deeply for several minutes and walked out of the stall, rescuing the poor dented can. He did _not_ need to get involved in the personal problem of his party – but this did mean they’d most likely have to adjust seating arrangements. Hyungwon automatically opened his phone to text Jooheon – and then realized he needed to get used to having to physically communicate information to him.

Smoothing his hair one last time, Hyungwon left the bathroom.

When he caught up with the party, Jooheon was immersed in a conversation with the drivers, Hongbin and Hyuk.

Carefully glancing around, Changkyun was sulking in a corner, which was what Hyungwon expected. Minhyuk, on the other hand, was avidly engaged in a story with Kihyun and Hyunwoo.

Not overly eager, either – like if he was overcompensating. Rather it appeared as if the incident in the bathroom had no effect on him at all.

Hyungwon knew he shouldn’t think too deeply on what happened, but eyeing Changkyun now, he wondered what exactly led him to lash out at Minhyuk like that – and what led Minhyuk to intrude on his life.

“Right, we should split up cars now, shouldn’t we?” Jooheon called. “We’ll have two cars going to the campsite, and the luggage split between the two. The drive should be around four hours, so be sure to have everything you need and have a bathroom break.”

Hyungwon felt a pang of guilt at Jooheon having assumed the lead in this tour – after all, Hyungwon was the senior. He stood next to Jooheon, and smiled broadly, tugging on his blazer.

“We could split up three and two?” he suggested. “I’ll go with Changkyun and Kihyun?”

“Actually, if it would be okay, I’d like to travel with Hyunwoo. I think Kihyun and Hoseok would like to probably join us as well,” Changkyun interrupted.

“But… the luggage.” Hyungwon said, suddenly fearful. No, no, he was _not_ going to be in a car with that _thing_ for four hours after having just got off a transcontinental plane ride with him.  There was only so many times they could say ‘scissors beats paper’ to each other without actually cutting each other.

“All the luggage can go in one car,” Changkyun said smoothly. “I don’t see any problem, do any of you?”

It appeared only Kihyun questioned the obvious. “What about Minhyuk?”

They all turned to look at Minhyuk, who shrugged. “Whatever works. I’ll probably sleep in the car, anyway.”

“We can’t leave Minhyuk alone,” Hoseok chastised.

“I really don’t care, Hoseok. It’s fine,” Minhyuk replied.

Hyungwon wanted to interrupt, and say something, give a speech about the power of friendship – but perhaps a bit of space would be necessary for them to make up. Even if that ‘space’ was a four hour drive through the wilderness.

Jooheon turned to the drivers, but had his eyes on Hyungwon. “What’s going on?”

Hyungwon looked over his shoulder, but the tourists seemed to be preoccupied in their conversation. “The two had a little spat in the bathroom. I’ll tell you later.”

“Which two?”

“Our plane buddies. Quirky and Drunkie, Snow White’s forgotten elves.”

Jooheon nodded wisely. “If that’s the case then let’s just agree with what they decided. I’ll take the others, you can take Minhyuk and the luggage?”

“No, no, no! I spent hours on a plane with him!” Hyungwon hissed. “He saw my _nipples_.”

“Look, I know it’s not ideal, but you know him! You two seem to be able to keep up a conversation. I haven’t even spoken to him, I can’t be alone with him for four hours.”

Jooheon was using dirty manipulation tactics like _logic_ and _reasoning_ , and Hyungwon couldn’t believe he’d sink that low. “Jooheon…”

“Go with Hyuk and Minhyuk and the luggage. Look. It’ll be fine. Nothing can go wrong. He said he’ll sleep. We’ll meet up at the campsite and work out a plan for the rest, okay?”

Hyungwon felt more and more like a child that Jooheon was babysitting. Exactly when did the intern wearing too much blind Hyungwon met three years ago turn into this beacon of professionalism?

“Hyuk, care to drive with Hyungwon and Minhyuk? You’ll have a lot of the luggage, but it should be fine.”

Hyuk, a sparkly eyed youth smiled. “No problem! I’ll bring the car around!”

While this airport was much less busier than the last one, it still made Hyungwon uncomfortable. Airports never felt real, always like some sort of transition place, like they’re just out of reality – and the only thing Hyungwon had to ground him was five tourists and Jooheon. He missed his desk. His fish. His aloe - he paused just to curse Seungjun’s name one last time for good luck.

He breathed deeply, trying to steady himself. He should be more excited. He was in Africa! That was exciting! This was his first international trip! (Excusing the Booze Cruise of 2014, which Hyungwon constantly excused).

“Did you step on something, Hyungwon? You look in pain,” Kihyun commented.

Ugh. He was going to have to get used to this.

“Not to worry. I’ll see you all at the campsite. Drive safe!” Hyungwon said with his customer service smile.

Jooheon looked at Hyungwon, his eyes narrowed in intensity. “You’ll be okay on your own?”

“Of course I will Jooheon. This is my job. I’m very good at my job. Don’t worry about me. I’ll see you soon.”

Hyungwon wondered why this parting felt quite _so_ dramatic. Jooheon nodded, shook Hyungwon's hand and escorted everyone else to the parking lot, leaving the luggage behind with Minhyuk and Hyungwon.

Minhyuk was looking at his nails, yawning.

“Are you sure you don’t mind driving alone?” Hyungwon asked cautiously.

“I mean, you’ll be there. So will the driver. That’s not alone, is it?” Minhyuk replied.

“Well, no, but-”

“Don’t think too deeply about it,” Minhyuk cut off. “Anyway, if I remember correctly, I was in the lead for rock, paper, scissors, so I’m quite excited to where this match ends.”

Hyungwon wasn’t.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading stay frosty (it's so fucking hot rn I, personally, would love to stay frosty)


	3. Roadblock

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was deliberating on whether or not to post this, but I think we all need a bit of joy in our life right now, especially under these heartbreaking circumstances, and if anyone can smile reading this, then I'll feel a little better.

Minhyuk had _insisted_ upon the front seat from the moment Hyuk packed the luggage in the boot, relegating Hyungwon to the back seat, condensed between several of the overflow suitcases. He could feel the handle of one of the cases poking against his arm, while Minhyuk stretched out his legs, his headrest currently shoving against Hyungwon’s chin.

Hyuk merely chuckled to himself upon seeing the situation. The driver was rather quiet, surprisingly so – usually Getaway drivers were chosen for their charisma and knowledge of the land. They were supposed to continuously talk through the ride, not _chuckle_ at the mistreatment of the long-suffering tour guides. Hyungwon made a mental note to tell Mr Kim that a driver should always be skilled at filling awkward silence - it wasn’t like Hyungwon knew anything about smalltalk. 

Minhyuk was enraptured the moment the Jeep drove out of the airport, with his face pressed against the glass, pointing at everything.

“Hyungwon, look, there’s a convenience store!” 

“That’s not too surprising.”

“But it’s in _Africa_.”

“They have convenience stores in Africa, Minhyuk,” Hyungwon said, only after checking out the window and seeing it himself, just to be sure. The town was reminiscent of home, and the locals barely spared a glance to the Jeep as it continued on its path.

The gravel road ahead blurred into itself, and the trees raced past and soon they were entirely out of civilization, and straight into the forest.

“It’s incredible, there’s just so much green here,” Minhyuk murmured, and Hyungwon was reminded of those dogs that stick their heads out of moving cars with their tongues flapping behind. He smiled to himself as he rolled down the window, savouring the breeze.

Hyungwon had already grown so accustomed to Minhyuk's babbling, he had droned it out to a point where he hadn’t even heard Minhyuk say: “Oh, is that a gun?”

When his brain connected the words to meaning, his eyes shot open.

Hyungwon sat bolt upright, staring at Hyuk, who was fixed on the road, a smile carved on his face.

“It’s for any wildlife. It’s standard safety policy,” Hyuk said, shifting the gun closer as it rested on his side of the driver’s seat.

A frown creased on Hyungwon's face. This was the first he _ever_ heard of this. But…

It wasn’t like he knew better, he never read any info. He hadn’t gotten a single moment alone to go through the packets of Botswana printouts he had, and for all he knew, Hyuk _was_ supposed to carry an AK-47 with him, and by making a fuss over it, he’d just embarrass them both and the company.

He’d ask Jooheon when he got back.

“What wildlife can we expect?” Minhyuk asked.

Belatedly, Hyungwon realized the question was directed at him. Animals, animals, he knew animals, he _definitely_ knew at least one animal in the entire continent of Africa, he could answer this. “Crocodiles.”

Hyuk hummed in agreement and Hyungwon nearly fainted in relief. “Oh, I’ve seen so many of them. Nasty beasts.”

Minhyuk edged away from the window. “Anything else?”

“Bugs. Lots of them. And flamingos.” Perhaps he should have quit while he was ahead with ‘crocodiles’ but flamingos seemed reasonable enough. 

“Huh,” Minhyuk hummed. “Wouldn’t have guessed. The more you know.” He craned around to look at Hyungwon in the back seat and grinned. “So, Chae Dot Hyungwon-“

Oh this was not going to be a conversation he wanted to have.

“Yes, Aka Minhyukku?” Hyungwon replied.

Minhyuk laughed at the use of his Instagram handle. “Jooheon mentioned this was your guys’ first time to Africa. I thought you’d travel all the time.”

Hyungwon shrugged. “Our job is just to book flights, we don’t go on them. I’m really not a tour guide by profession.” He belatedly remembered that he actually _was_ a tour guide by profession. “That, is to say, I believe guiding tours is not just a profession, more like a passion. A drive inside of you.”

“Aww, you’re cute when you talk bullshit,” Minhyuk cooed and Hyungwon felt about ten years old.

He crossed his arms, thinking that the _moment_ he was at the campsite, he’d ditch Minhyuk and go scream into the woods for a few moments.

 “We’re really in the jungle now, aren’t we,” Minhyuk said.

“Forest,” Hyungwon corrected. He knew _that_ much. “It’s a forest. Jungles are nearly impenetrable, forests just have tall trees.”

“Ah, yes, how could I have forgotten?” Minhyuk asked, failing to keep the sarcasm from his voice.

Well, fuck him, Hyungwon was right.

“Do you travel this route very often, Hyuk?” he asked.

There had been a delay between Hongbin and Hyuk’s car leaving the airport, but even so, it was strange that there weren’t even tire tracks on the road to suggest that Hongbin had driven through. It would be horribly inconvenient to get lost.

“Oh yeah, loads of times. Don’t worry about it, sometimes we take different routes.” Hyuk assured him.

“We must have been driving for like two hours now, haven’t we?”

He nodded. “Oh yeah, we’re well on our way.”

Satisfied, Hyungwon leaned back more comfortably in his seat, and let his eyes drift to the sight of the endless trees as he savoured the cool air.

Minhyuk suddenly let out a harsh laugh. “I just realized all the others are going to be so bored in the car. All the food and games we brought with are in the luggage.”

Visions of Minhyuk being escorted to the hospital after being involved in a horrific Twister accident entered his mind.

 “Oh, and also, all the money,” Minhyuk added thoughtfully.

Hyungwon's eyes widened. “Jesus, Minhyuk, are you telling me they have no money between them?”

“Well, I’m sure Kihyun keeps like twenty bucks in his underwear,” Minhyuk conceded. “But I’m sure the other tour guide has something right? If there’s any emergencies?”

Hyungwon would _hope_ so. Jooheon exchanged what little currency they had when they got off the plane, but they relied on company cards for pretty much _everything_ – and that would not be of use in the middle of nowhere.

Another suggestion for Mr Kim, Hyungwon supposed.

If Hyungwon was a more observant man, he would have noticed that Hyuk’s knuckles were white against the steering wheel.

But Hyungwon was tired, sore, and had been playing a game of rock, paper, scissors every ten minutes for the past hour, and when he closed his eyes for a moment, and drowned out Minhyuk's chatter, he thought nothing of it when Hyuk joined the conversation.

“What’s going on?” Minhyuk said.

“I’m being quite serious,” Hyuk was saying.

“But… you’re the driver.”

“And what has that got to do with anything?”

“But… you’re not supposed to.”

Hyungwon tried to block them out, but the sudden change in inertia prompted him to open his eyes. “Oh, the car stopped.”  His eyes opened.

Hyuk turned to face Hyungwon, and there was quite obvious annoyance in the face from the way his eyebrows slanted down. “Perhaps you’ll catch on quicker. Get out of the car.”

And Hyuk pointed the gun straight at Hyungwon, and Hyungwon thought that this was just unnecessary.

It was very dark, the gun. Really black. With hints of silver. Gunmetal silver – _oh,_ so that’s why they called it that. It really was quite a _big_ gun as well, he wondered if Hyuk had ever tried to shoot crocodiles with it.

An odd sense of serenity came over Chae Hyungwon as he attempted to understand what he woke up to. This was fine. He was being threatened by an actual working gun in the middle of nowhere. He could actually die at this moment. This was fine.

“Oh,” Hyungwon finally said.

“Hyungwon, what’s going on?” Minhyuk's voice was far too soft.

“I’m gonna say this one more time. Get out of the car,” Hyuk said, speaking only to Hyungwon.

“Minhyuk, you should get out of the car,” Hyungwon said, his eyes still locked with Hyuk.

Who the hell even hired this guy, Hyungwon wondered. He would have to tell Mr Kim about this, assuming he didn’t die. If he did die, he could only hope Hyuk gets violently assaulted by flamingos on his way back.

The front door opened, and Minhyuk stumbled out, mumbling something incoherent and Hyungwon was alone in the car.

“Now you,” Hyuk said.

Hyungwon wished he could summon any other emotion than confusion. “Why?”

“Because I’ll shoot you if you don’t?” Hyuk said, incredulously, waving the gun. “How are you two so difficult to rob? Are you just _both_ stupid?”

Numbness filled Hyungwon, and numbness seemed to be mistaken for bravery. Hyuk pressed the gun into Hyungwon's chest, and he was suddenly very aware that if Hyuk flicked a finger, he wouldn’t have a ribcage anymore.

That would be problematic.

Hyungwon rested his hand on the door handle and opened it, edging back carefully. He had his feet on the ground outside now.

“Close it,” Hyuk ordered, gesturing to the door with the gun.

Perhaps it was because he was now outside, looking in, or the way the sun seemed to catch on the red fabric of his suit, or he just finally realized he was being _robbed_ but Hyungwon snapped out of his reverie.

“Hyuk, wait, no, we don’t have any food or water.”

“That’s not my problem. Close the fucking door.”

Hyungwon wished he would have said something noble like “Close your fucking _mouth_ ” and then decked him in the face and saved the day.

What Hyungwon did end up saying was: “I’m in a suit! Please! I can’t walk around like this! It’s like a million degrees!”

Something like mercy mixed with bewilderment flashed across Hyuk’s face and he threw out Hyungwon's duffle bag, closing the door himself, and switched the ignition on, leaving a cloud of dust behind where the car was seconds ago.

The Jeep sped on, till it disappeared down the linear path,  and Hyungwon observed the way the gravel from the screeching tyres settled on his shiny shoes, entirely transfixed.

“H-h-hyungwon?” Minhyuk murmured, tapping Hyungwon on the shoulder.

Hyungwon turned, entirely forgetting his companion. “Minhyuk.”

The two stared at each other, speechless. 

“Are you hurt?” Hyungwon finally asked, his mind still attempting to process the events that had transpired.

“No. Are you?”

Hyungwon looked down at his chest, where the gun had pressed against him moments earlier, relieved to see he did in fact, still have a torso. “No.”

“Hyungwon?” Minhyuk said, his voice quivering.

“Yes, Minhyuk?”

“What just happened?”

That was a good question. “I think we just got robbed. Hijacked? Something like that.” Hyungwon stopped to reconsider. “Actually, that’s definitely what happened. We definitely just got robbed. He said so and everything.”

“But-”

“Yes.”

Minhyuk's eyes were worryingly glassy, and all Hyungwon could think was that if he started crying, Hyungwon would not know what to do. Maybe pat him on the back?

He blinked and took the opportunity to truly comprehend his surroundings. Green. Green. So much green? The trees were densely clustered on either side, the only break being the gravel road they currently stood on.

There was nothing in the horizon but the road stretching out further. Hyungwon felt like a part of him should be panicking, but he felt so distant from everything, as if the real Hyungwon was still in the car, continuing on.

The same was not true for Minhyuk who immediately started hitting Hyungwon's shoulder. “What the fuck are we gonna do?! Where are we?!” The hitting increased in frequency and Hyungwon's shoulder began to ache. “Hyungwon! Do something!”

Hyungwon shoved Minhyuk's hands off. “Calm down! Okay, just calm the fuck down!”

“Don’t swear at me!”

“Stop hitting me then!”

Hyungwon stared at Minhyuk, the fear evident in his eyes. Sighing, Hyungwon supposed he had a duty to _attempt_ to placate him – even if Hyungwon himself had no clue what to do.

“Okay, let’s just… sit in the shade, and just figure out our situation. It’s really hot here.”

Minhyuk opened his mouth to protest, but swallowed it, trudging to the nearest tree and flopped on the ground, all dramatic and theatrical. He brought his knees to his chest. “Oh god, oh god, what the fuck are we going to do?”

Hyungwon did the same, carrying the duffle bag with him, and winced. He wished he could say the Botswanan grass was soft and gentle, like a soft pillow – it wasn’t. It didn’t do anything to soothe the pain his ass felt as it ended up on hard ground.

“Okay,” Hyungwon said, inhaling. “Let’s start with the basics. Do you have your phone?”

“My phone… my phone…” Minhyuk instantly began performing a strip search upon himself, scratching in every remote pocket he had, and eventually whipped it out of his jeans. “I do! My precious phone! We’re fine! We’re saved!”

“Do you have reception?”

Minhyuk's face fell as he unlocked the screen. “Uh. No.”

“I didn’t think so,” Hyungwon replied, rubbing his temples. “My phone’s nearly dead.”

Minhyuk's grip tightened around his phone. “Where are we exactly?”

“Uh? Somewhere in the wilderness of Botswana? I have no clue,” Hyungwon said, and mentally kicked himself. Professional, Hyungwon, professional. “I’m really not sure, I was relying entirely on the driver.”

“The same driver who just pointed a gun at both of us and stole all our luggage?” Minhyuk clarified.

“Yes, that’s the one.”

There were quite a lot of pretty trees in this forest, Hyungwon observed. It was nice, in that sort of way that a sunset would be nice before the world explodes.

“He gave me the duffle bag, at least. That was… nice?” Hyungwon said, running his hands over the fabric.

The duffle bag was anything _but_ nice. It was an obnoxiously bright green, emblazoned with the Getaway logo and featuring the most questionable slogan to emerge from the company: “ _The only baggage you need to worry about is the emotional kind!”_

“I can’t fucking believe you were concerned about your suit instead of, like, your life? Or food? Or water?” Minhyuk grumbled, mostly under his breath.

“It wasn’t… it wasn’t something I thought about it. It just… happened.”

“Who thinks about that when they have a gun in their face?!”

Hyungwon ignored him, opening the bag and emptying out the contents on the floor. There were the information printouts on Botswana – which he quickly shoved back - and some of the more important carry-on items Hyungwon packed: his hairbrush, aftershave, a razor. He kept the can of dry shampoo in his bag, rather than having any awkward conversation.

The only thing of value was the single bottle of water, a pack of almonds and saltine crackers.

“Are you a parrot?” Minhyuk said, distastefully holding the crackers up.

“It was from the plane! I didn’t expect to need to shove a whole feast in my damn carry-on.”

“You know what I had in my luggage? _Everything_. At least half of the weight is just gummy bears and marshmallows.”

“Your dentist is putting his children through college because of you.”

“Good. I’m glad. It’s called supporting the community,” Minhyuk said, reaching for the crackers.

Hyungwon snatched it from him. “What are you _doing_? This is our only food, and you’re gonna shove it down your hole?”

Minhyuk stared. “My hole?”

“Your mouth?”

“Yeah, I know what it was referring to Hyungwon, it was more an expression of disbelief. I mean, can you really talk to me like that?”

Oh. Oh, that’s…

Hyungwon had entirely forgotten his _job_. Mr Kim would have thirty violations written up for this entire conversation and Hyungwon flushed.

“I, uh, apologize. It’s just a stressful situation,” Hyungwon said. He rubbed his forehead of sweat. “Okay, let’s think about this. Is _all_ of your luggage in that car?”

Minhyuk nodded, biting his lip. “Oh fuck, Hyungwon, what are we going to do?”

Unfurling one of the maps he brought with, Hyungwon laid it out, attempting to find Ghanzi.

“Okay, well, we travelled for about two hours, so we should be… here?” Hyungwon said pointing to an area of green. “And the camp should be, uh…”

Any direction from where they currently were, truthfully. “Four hours” wasn’t necessarily a good measure of distance.

“The road,” Hyungwon said. “We’ll just have to follow the road.”

“…Follow the road? Like… walking?”

“Well, I’m not carrying you,” Hyungwon replied.

“You know that sounds crazy, right? We can’t just… keep walking.”

It _was_ crazy. The heat already started to press up against Hyungwon, and he felt the sweat collect under his shirt collar. He packed everything up in his duffle bag.

“We don’t really have another option. We can’t just… wait here. No one will look for us.”

Hyungwon slung the bag over his back, and began walking, at a deliberately slow pace for Minhyuk to catch up with, and sure enough he heard the sound of someone trailing behind him.

“What do you mean no one will look for us? Of course they will! Kihyun’s gonna notice I’m not there for dinner!”

“They’ll notice,” Hyungwon conceded. “But where would they begin to look for us? We’re in the middle of a road that we don’t know the name of? How do we know if this is even the right route? I’d say our best bet is just to keep following the road and hope to either reach the camp or someone else.”

Minhyuk stopped. “That’s our plan? Walk and maybe we’ll stop walking at some point?”

“Do you have a better one?”

“Lie in the dirt and wait for someone to save us?”

Hyungwon continued walking, and Minhyuk followed soon after. He continued grumbling under his breath for a good half an hour, but as the sun continued beating down on them, he was reduced to silence.

It was far too annoying the way the trees all looked _exactly_ the same – they’d been walking for thirty minutes, yet it looked like they were in the same place as they started. They effortlessly blurred together, and Hyungwon's eyes began to ache.

“Can we have a water break?” Minhyuk asked.

Hyungwon clasped his duffle bag closer. By sole virtue of ownership, Hyungwon now found himself in control of the food rationing, and with only one bottle of water to spare for the foreseeable future, it was with a fair amount of awkwardness that Hyungwon now found himself in as he shook his head.

“Are you serious?”

Hyungwon flushed. “We just… don’t have enough, and we’ve only just started walking. We don’t know how long we’ll be… lost.”

It was almost amusing the way Minhyuk seemed to genuinely turn red with anger.

“Are you telling me I can’t even have a goddamn sip of water even though we’ve been walking for _hours_?”

“It’s been like one.”

“It’s been three!” Minhyuk cried. “I’ve been checking!” He held out his phone – and _wow_ , it had actually been three hours?

“You should stop wasting your battery,” Hyungwon said, drifting under the shade. It was four o’clock now, and his legs were protesting in pain at having done more walking in a single day than he usually did in a week.

“ _Hyungwonnnnnn_ ,” Minhyuk whined, flopping down on the grass, a dramatic splay of limbs. “Please.”

“No. Maybe in like an hour.”

“Fuck you.”

The conversation naturally ended, and Hyungwon rested his back against a tree, regaining his breath. As a positive, as it grew later, the day was cooler – but that meant night was coming, and Hyungwon did not have even the faintest idea what to do about sleeping.

They couldn’t sleep in the road - that would be a surefire way to end up as a headline in a local Botswanan newspaper. “ _ **STUPID TOURIST LIES IN ROAD, IS SURPRISED WHEN THEY GET DRIVEN OVER**_ ”. Hyungwon always wanted to be immortalized in the newspaper when he died, but ideally it would be for dying an attractive billionaire who saved an entire orphanage from a fire. _Not_ because he got his vertebrae wedged in the wheels of a passing car.

Where then?

Hyungwon looked over at Minhyuk, currently face down in grass. “Minhyuk?”

Minhyuk grunted into the ground in response.

“Uh, I wanted to get your opinion. On our next move?”

Another grunt. Hyungwon hammered on, hoping to get back in his good books by including him in their planning.

“Specifically about what we intend to do for the night? I think we should accept that we’re probably not reaching the camp tonight, even if we were to continue walking.”

Minhyuk rolled onto his stomach and looked up at Hyungwon. “And you don’t have a plan?”

“Well. No. No, I don’t. That’s why I wanted your thoughts.”

“Oh, I have some thoughts.”

Hyungwon had a fairly good idea what those thoughts are, and they’d probably involve some forms of expletives and yelling. “Fine. I suggest we go deeper in the forest and uh, find some nice grass.”

“Nice grass,” Minhyuk repeated.

Hyungwon fanned himself. “It’s the best I’ve got. Any other objections?”

“Can I get some water?”

Hyungwon hesitated. Minhyuk was already grumpy, and the prospect of having to sleep next to someone who was clearly cursing him in his head…

“Only a sip,” Hyungwon advised, tossing the bottle. His own throat was parched, but he ignored it, focusing on trying to placate the manchild next to him.

Minhyuk caught the bottle, and drank – more than Hyungwon would have liked, but showing clear restraint – and wiped his mouth and handed the bottle back.

“Well, let’s go.”

 

“Ah, what a beautiful hotel room – the view is kinda disappointing though,” Minhyuk asked, surveying the area of forest, and even though it was an objectively terrible joke, it was the first thing Minhyuk had said in hours that wasn’t directly antagonistic and Hyungwon forced himself to laugh.

The canopy of trees hovered over them, and Hyungwon couldn’t even see the sky – just endless mounds of green. It was almost claustrophobic – which seemed _ridiculous_. He couldn’t be in a more open space if he was on the surface of the moon.

“I’ll take this spot,” Hyungwon said, kicking the ground with his shoe. It was so _hard_. His spine protested in advance.

He sat on the ground, trying to dust off the excess sand – jokes on him, all of it _was_ excess sand. Easing off his shoes, he finally took off his socks.

“Oh god,” he muttered, seeing the red raw steaks where his feet used to be. “Oh _god_.”

“Jesus. Hyungwon, have you even heard of jogging?” Minhyuk said, staring.

“I do. Sometimes.”

“Not in the last decade by my assumption.”

Hyungwon looked at Minhyuk's feet, which while red, still _seemed_ normal. In fact, they looked rather nice, at which point Hyungwon tore his gaze away because he was _not_  about to end up a foot fetishist.

Still, if he _was_ , Minhyuk's feet were a strong candidate-

“Do you want to have some crackers to eat? Say two each?” Hyungwon asked, taking the saltines out of his duffle bag. There were 30 in the pack, and Hyungwon didn’t fancy the chances of finding other food.

Minhyuk nodded. “Yes, _please_. I’m starving. All I’m thinking about is those marshmallows. There were like _six_ packets of them, Hyungwon, it filled a whole cart in the store.”

Hyungwon handed the crackers over. Marshmallows, despite being for _children_ , would be a thousand times better than these stale pieces of salted cardboard.

“They taste nice,” Minhyuk said, scrunching his face up as he bit into the crackers, and Hyungwon knew he must have _really_ tried hard to sound sincere.

“If it’s anything, I’d prefer the marshmallows too,” Hyungwon sighed, crunching.

The sun was setting now, and Hyungwon could see flocks of birds flying, like black dots against the sky.

“Do you think it’ll be cold?” Minhyuk asked, also observing the twilight through gaps in the trees.

“God, I hope so. It’s been a thousand degrees all day.”

“Is that in Celsius or Fahrenheit?”

“Fuck you.”

Minhyuk laughed, and lay on the ground. The tension of the day began to chip away, and Hyungwon breathed an internal sigh of relief. This was, of course, a _good_ thing. The last thing Hyungwon wanted to do was drag the irritated toddler along with him through the wilderness of the jungle. Forest. Whatever. It didn’t _matter_ what they called it, they were still hopelessly lost in it.

But he’d rather die than admit that.

Hyungwon looked down, realizing he hadn’t gotten around to taking off his jacket. It was at that exact moment he also realized just how _tight_ his dress shirt was. It shouldn’t surprise him, when he went for the fitting, Mr Kim personally lectured him on how a tight suit showed the worth of a man – and the female stylists seemed to heartily agree.

He shouldn’t be self-conscious – but he’d feel _so_ naked without the jacket. The prospect of sleeping without any sort of pillow was even worse, and while sneaking a glance at Minhyuk's state of being – he took it off and shoved it under his head.

There was a wolf whistle and Hyungwon felt like covering himself with dirt. “What?”

“Nothing,” Minhyuk smirked. “It’s just wild you wear that to work. It’s so sparkly and tight, it looks like it belongs in a magic show.”

“It’s not- I’m not…”

Hyungwon had never felt more insulted in his life. “ _Goodnight_.” He spat, aggressively lying down, and immediately regretting it as his back ached.

It was about five minutes before Minhyuk started talking.

“When do you think the others will arrive at the camp?”

Hyungwon sighed, blearily reaching to his pocket for his phone. It was just after seven, and yes, they were probably there already. His eyes drifted shut. Jooheon was probably in their private cabin by now, having a _bath_.

Hyungwon would kill for a bath. His pants were fused to his body through sweat alone.

“They’re already there. Probably wondering where the hell we are. Wondering where their luggage is.”

“I wonder if they think you murdered me,” Minhyuk said aloud, and Hyungwon's eyes shot open.

“Would they?” Hyungwon asked. “I seem like an upstanding citizen.”

Every elderly woman Hyungwon had ever served always insisted upon what a lovely young man he was, and more than once tried to encourage him to date their grandchildren. He had never even got a parking ticket.

“Well, you do.”

And Hyungwon thought that was the end of that but then –

“But doesn’t it seem strange that we were in each other’s company for so long and then we suddenly disappear? Maybe they’ll think I drove you to murder,” Minhyuk said animatedly. “You _know_ , I did mention to Hoseok we had a good time on the plane-”

“We did _not_ have a good time on the plane,” Hyungwon interjected. “It was a horrible fourteen hour flight, followed by hours in cramped car, _followed by hours of walking_.”

“If you’re quite done complaining, I was talking,” Minhyuk said.

That stung. Hyungwon clamped his mouth down.

“Anyway, Hoseok might think I was just looking too deeply into things, and I’m sure after a while, the topic of murder will come up.”

“He’s the one who was with Soyou right?”

“No, that’s Hyunwoo.”

Surely, this wasn’t _actually_ happening. Hyungwon had been concerning about losing his job for swearing, not about being on trial for fucking murder.

“I’m not sure if this is an insult on myself or you, Minhyuk,” Hyungwon said. “How likely are people to kill you? Like is this a thing a regular danger for you?”

Minhyuk hummed under his breath. “Not yet. But Kihyun has threatened to strangle me at least five times. A week. In fact, he said that if he wasn’t the one to kill me, he’d want to buy dinner for the person who did.”

Hyungwon turned to look at Minhyuk, who seemed entirely unaffected by the conversation.

“You know, I always thought I was going be murdered,” Minhyuk informed him, with the same tone one would use to share the weather. “I went to a tarot reader once at this fair, and she told me exactly that. Said she didn’t even _have_ five Death cards, yet, there it was when I picked them out of the deck.”

Hyungwon's brows furrowed in worry. “That doesn’t seem possible.”

“That’s what I told her, man! But she started telling me I was ‘bad news’ and ‘cursed’ and shouldn’t wear ‘spots and stripes at the same time’. Ridiculous.”

Not for the first time, Hyungwon wondered exactly what went through Minhyuk's head.

“I think Jooheon knows I don’t have the stomach for murder. I can’t even eat curry,” Hyungwon said, wondering exactly why he was trying to soothe Minhyuk's deranged rambling.

“Oh good. Good to hear.”

Minhyuk stopped talking and Hyungwon chanced at closing his eyes, attempting to ignore the pebbles pressing into his spine, and focused on his breathing.

“Do you think we’ll find the others tomorrow?” Minhyuk said, his voice soft.

 “Yes, Minhyuk. I think we will.”

He didn’t think that at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love you all.


	4. U-Turn

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you so much for the kudos and response so far!!

Hyungwon always hated birds. They move far too fast, and they always disappear when the sun went down. Where did they go? Was there some sort of secret cave where they all went to at sunset? Why did he never see a pigeon at night?

Hyungwon was jerked awake from his sleep by some _extremely_ loud tweeting. He liked to think he was facing the hardships of being stranded fairly well, after all the back aching was understandable, his sweaty chest was bearable – the birds were _not_.

“When I get home,” Hyungwon murmured, his voice thick with sleep, “the first meal I’m having is grilled duck served with barbecue chicken wings. I’ve never tried ostrich but I’ll give that a go too. Just shove an entire pigeon down my throat. I never want to see a single bird again.”

“You’re quite the carnivore, aren’t you?” he heard a voice remark.

Minhyuk. For a brief moment, he almost forgot about _that._ It was too early for that particular disaster of a person.

Hyungwon rubbed his eyes as the threat of dehydration occupied his mind, his tongue feeling more and more like sandpaper with every minute. He grabbed his dufflebag, reaching for the bottle of water, and instantly knew Minhyuk had drunk some while Hyungwon was asleep.

The bottle was now slightly under halfway full, and Hyungwon sat up, groaning loudly. “Minhyuk, you did _not_.”

The thief in question immediately darted up before disappearing behind one of the trees. “I’m sorry! I woke up before you, and I was thirsty, and it was only a sip but I got a bit carried away…”

“ _Minhyuk!_ We don’t have any more water after this!”

“We’ll find some! Definitely!”

Minhyuk's heightened tone betrayed his lack of conviction in his words – still hiding behind the trees, only a vague flash of red hair betraying his position.

Hyungwon filed his anger away for later, and drank the water deeply, the liquid stinging his cracked lips.

He had spent his life as a fool, believing the lie of “all water tastes the same”. Water was good. Water was amazing. He would never _ever_ decline a glass of water at a restaurant ever again.

Hyungwon forced himself to stop, sighing at the rapidly emptying bottle. “Minhyuk, come over here. We need to figure out what direction we’re walking in.”

Minhyuk finally emerged from the trees, his hair a complete mess of tangles and twigs, and Hyungwon cracked a smile. He pulled out a brush from his duffle bag and threw it to Minhyuk. “You have an entire ecosystem up there.”

Popping a saltine cracker into his mouth, Hyungwon checked the time on his draining phone. It was eight o’clock – later than he would have liked.

“We could keep following the road – but it means we won’t find any water. I’m also not too familiar with the route if there’s any twists or turns. It’ll mean a lot of walking in the sun, staring at the horizon. I think. Also animals? Maybe?”

“Please, do go on, this is exactly the kind of fascinating Botswanan insight I was paying for,” Minhyuk replied, ruffling his hands through his hair.

“The other option is to walk through the trees. It’ll be shady. Might find water. Maybe even food. But… we might get lost.”

“We’re already lost,” Minhyuk pointed out, reaching into Hyungwon's lap and taking out a cracker.

“I say, give it a try. We can’t get any _more_ lost.”

“But we _can_ get eaten by a tiger.”

Still, despite his protesting, Minhyuk trailed after Hyungwon as he started walking.

 

Hyungwon was distressed. This wasn't uncommon as Hyungwon was known in high school for his absurdly high anxiety whenever he was forced to leave the classroom. Still, who was the one laughing when his classmates got mauled by that penguin on that trip to the zoo? Not Hyungwon, because he was crying on the bus in the foetal position, but the sentiment remains.

For once, he actually had a very good reason to be distressed. They were running out of food, were low on water, were completely lost in a foreign country - and yet all his anxiety seemed to be concentrated on one particular _thing -_ Lee Minhyuk.

The fact remained that regardless of Hyungwon's personal opinion on Lee Minhyuk (it was that he sucked), Lee Minhyuk's survival was the only way Hyungwon was going to be able to ever re-enter society, and if something happened to him, he would be _screwed_.

He couldn’t exactly turn up at the Botswanan authorities and explain that it was for the good of humanity that he left his travel ward strapped to a tree – that just wouldn’t go down well in a police report. 

Then, there was the matter of whether they’d even be found _at all_. Having to share already limited provisions turned out to be more difficult than he would have thought, and Minhyuk was hardly understanding about it. It was a lot like having to take care of a very temperamental pigeon whose only goal was to eat all his saltines.

It would have been a lot easier, Hyungwon reflected, if Minhyuk was ugly. Then it could just be actual hatred without any of the _other_ things.

The _other_ was what Hyungwon’s addled mind decided to file as 'misguided attraction’. Hyungwon, a dedicated employee, was merely under a lot of stress and his mind decided to take it out in the form of lust on the only potential target closest to him.  There was nothing more to it, it was just… desperation. If a particularly fetching mannequin was next to him, Hyungwon was sure he'd be fantasizing about the way its cold, plastic hand would trail up his thighs before cupping him with its rigid fingers. Really, it was nothing to worry about.  

It wasn't anything to do with the actual man. This was the hill Hyungwon was prepared to die on.

He had experience with this after all, in his first week at Getaway there was a dark period of thirteen days wherein he thought Mr Kim was more dreamy than delusional. Normally if Hyungwon was faced with any inappropriate feelings, he'd just throw himself into his work, and become a model employee. At the very least, he'd read a good book.

But all his good books were in his apartment, and his work was the very cause of his problems.

And said problem really was a chatty one.

Minhyuk fanned his face. “God, that's one thing they don't tell you about Africa, am I right? The heat!”

“Minhyuk, I feel that's one of the first things they tell you about Africa,” Hyungwon replied.

He agreed though, of course, as his now natural state of being was one soaked in sweat.

“What do you miss most from home?” Minhyuk asked after some time.

“My fish, I guess. They’re probably worried about where I am.” He hoped Hani was remembering to feed them.

If Minhyuk found the answer strange, his face didn’t betray any emotion. “Oh, your poor fish. What are their names?”

“Well, the black one is Woowoo and the gold one is Foofoo. I’ve had them for about two years now.”

“They sound delightful!” Minhyuk said, clapping his hands together. “Pity you couldn’t bring them with, but I suppose it’s for the best. We’d have drunk the water from their fishbowl.”

That was hardly a pleasant thought. “What do you miss?”

“Obviously I miss food and electricity and Overwatch and everything else, but I didn't realize how much I'd miss clouds. There's never any clouds here, it's always just… blue. Just blue heat.”

“It is just very blue, here. All the time,” Hyungwon remarked, his feet almost tripping on a tree root. “I miss not tripping over my own fucking feet all the time.”

 “Is there a sign to the campsite at least? Maybe neon, maybe glowing?” Minhyuk asked.

Hyungwon had seen the campsite on Google Maps – and no, it didn’t have a glowing neon sign. Another recommendation for Mr Kim, he supposed. “It's noticeable. It's like a giant chunk of forest just got taken out. There's also a road leading up to it.”

Hyungwon didn't expect Minhyuk's nose to scrunch up in distaste. “Did your capitalist corporation rip up untainted forest just to put in a campsite to reach your unrealistic profit targets?”

What Hyungwon said was: “I don't know.”

What he thought was: “Absolutely.”

Getaway did the whole 'green’ thing for a bit, put recycling bins all over the place, got rid of the asbestos ceiling and started emailing paychecks. But that was abandoned in about 3 months due to an unfortunate incident involving the technophobic payroll manager emailing links to dungeon porn and shortly after the company-funded counselling session, Getaway quietly dropped their Green Getaway branding.

“Your company is horrible,” Minhyuk said.

“I agree but also, on Wednesdays there’s this really good Caesar Salad in the cafeteria, and that keeps my loyalty.”

Minhyuk scoffed. “Typical corporate response.”

“What exactly is _corporate_ about liking salad?” Hyungwon asked, wondering if Minhyuk was just looking for more reasons to hate him. Fair enough, honestly, Hyungwon was looking for reasons to hate Minhyuk as well.

 

They found shade under a canopy of trees to regain their breaths and Hyungwon had intended to close his eyes for a few brief moments. He didn’t account for Minhyuk who must have been solar-powered and had _plenty_ of energy to dispense.

“So, Hyungwon, if we die, who do you think will find our bodies?” Minhyuk asked, cheerfully.

“No one,” Hyungwon said. “Probably just get eaten by a bear or something.”

“Does Botswana have bears?” Minhyuk asked.

“Can’t recall. I think it's too hot for bears though, isn't it?” Hyungwon said, half-heartedly attempting to bluff his way through.

And Hyungwon saw the expression on Minhyuk's face darken and realized in that instant, he should _not_ have been so careless.

“Assuming we don’t get eaten by bears that may or may not exist, what’s the plan if we get found?” Minhyuk asked abruptly.

This felt far too much like a trap. “A hospital visit. Possibly followed by several different vaccinations for every kind of disease from anaemia to yuppie flu.”

“But after that?” Minhyuk pressed. “When we get back home?”

There was something... suspicious about Minhyuk's words and Hyungwon could not place it.

“I don't know. We'd have to report Hyuk to the police. I doubt anything will come of it, however-” and Hyungwon paused, because he was making the dangerous mistake of assuming Minhyuk was his friend and not merely his charge. And that had been the mistake Hyungwon had kept consistently making.

Hyungwon should _not_ frankly speak of such things, because as he realized in that moment, Minhyuk could very easily sue Getaway and him for everything they both had.

“Oh. Do you…” Hyungwon paused. “Plan on pursuing legal action?”

“I hadn't decided,” Minhyuk replied, keeping his voice measured. “If I do, I think I'd have a good case against your company, though.”

He would.

He would have an excellent case. He could squeeze out the trauma from experience and publish an autobiography. Maybe he’d have movie rights. James Franco could play a whitewashed version of him when it hits big screens.

“How was anyone supposed to know Hyuk would turn out to be crazy?” Hyungwon muttered, running a hand through his hair.

“Well, your company is. You know, psychological evaluations are a thing,” Minhyuk said. “Is his gun even licensed?”

“How am I supposed to know?”

And all Minhyuk said was: “Isn't it _your_ job to know?”

And that seemed to fracture the veil of illusion that Hyungwon had wrapped around himself this entire time. This was it.

Hyungwon became entirely aware that this was becoming much less about Getaway and a lot more about Hyungwon, and his own incompetence.

Hyungwon knew he fucked up, he realized that from the moment he stepped on the plane, and realized he couldn't actually remember what part of Botswana he was going to. Hyungwon hadn’t even done the bare minimum, he had done _below_ the bare minimum, he was the floor that the bare minimum used to sleep on at night and frankly, a large part of the situation they now found themselves in was so because Hyungwon was so inept.

And the worst part perhaps was it was a _choice_. Hyungwon chose to be a terrible tour guide, he chose to become so embittered by his ‘promotion’ - he wasn't born stupid, he chose to be.

And now he'd get sued for it - if not worse. He could face _years_ in jail for this level of negligence. He couldn’t even ask Minhyuk not to pursue legal action, because, quite frankly, he had every single right to sue. If anything happened to him, if he died of dehydration or hunger, or got struck by goddamn lighting, it would be at least partly Hyungwon's fault for dragging him into this situation to begin with.

A pit formed in his stomach. “I guess you’re right,” Hyungwon said. “It is my job to know.”

Minhyuk nodded. “I thought as much.” His voice had a sharp edge to it.

It was blue, it was always blue in this wretched place, and the emotions Hyungwon carried with him didn’t really seem suited for the backdrop of green trees bathed in bright sunlight.  He carried his worries with him, smothering around him, and Hyungwon felt as if the trees and sky degraded into an ominous grey hue.

 

The afternoon sun beat down on them, and Hyungwon could almost see the literal anger radiate off Minhyuk as they pressed on.

And perhaps Hyungwon was absorbing some of that energy as well. If he had to listen to that redhead cretin complain about his sore legs one more time, Hyungwon would… well, he’d make sure his imminent prison time was worth it.

If Minhyuk was _so_ excited to sue, maybe Hyungwon should join in. Maybe he could lay a claim against Mr Kim for emotional trauma caused by the red suits - or just go all the way to the top, sue God for allowing Hyungwon to be born.

 “Where the fuck are we?” Minhyuk said. “I feel like I saw that S shaped tree at least ten times.” 

“Yes, of course, I know _exactly_ where we are, I’ve kept it a secret all this time, I just wanted to keep you in suspense,” Hyungwon said, wiping sweat from his brow, leaving droplets of water on the sparkly red satin of his suit. “God I hate this weather.”

“Don’t get snarky with me, no one’s allowed to be sarcastic looking like a reject from Houdini’s last performance,” Minhyuk said. “Are we going in the right direction at least?”

Anger prickled at Hyungwon. Only _he_ was allowed to insult the suits.

The road had disappeared some time ago, along with most of Hyungwon's will to live. If Hyungwon had previously thought the trees made him feel like he was trapped, it was no match for claustrophobia - he felt like a bee in a glass jar.

“I don’t know,” Hyungwon sighed. “We are starting to look more and more fucked.”

He chastised himself internally for swearing but gave up as he looked at Minhyuk, who was a mess of sweat and dirty clothes, and probably looked the same to him.

No doubt by now Jooheon would have regarded them as missing – but what would he do about it? He couldn’t bundle all four of his tour group together in the single Jeep and go looking for Hyungwon, but it’s not as if he’d just leave the missing travellers to death? It wasn’t as if he could let Hongbin drive on his own as well…

Hyungwon's nails dug into the bark of the tree he leaned on, flaking off in his hand. Not for the first time, Hyungwon wondered if he’d die here – but perhaps not in the cataclysmic way he initially thought featuring wild leopards ripping him limb from limb.

“Water,” Minhyuk demanded, holding out his hand expectantly.

“Do _not_ drink a lot,” Hyungwon said, grabbing the bottle and throwing it to Minhyuk.

That was _another_ problem. A slow death by dehydration would be one of the worst ways to die, Hyungwon decided, and much less interesting than the wild leopards.

“Okay, stop drinking,” Hyungwon said, holding his hand out to collect the bottle.

Minhyuk replied by decisively showing him the middle finger, to which Hyungwon snatched the bottle out of his mouth, hitting the top against Minhyuk’s teeth, which he felt at least 2% guilty for.

Swallowing the remaining water in his mouth, Minhyuk rubbed his jaw, scowling. “Was that necessary?”

“I did tell you to stop.”

“You haven’t let me drink in hours!”

“We don’t have more water, it’s not like I _want_ this.”

“I don’t want this either! And I don’t want you for that matter as well! You’re so mean to me!” Minhyuk said, shaking his head distastefully. “We’re gonna die in this fucking jungle and I’m stuck with _you_.”

Hyungwon took offense at that. “It’s not a jungle, it’s a forest, okay?”

“Does the word choice matter? We’re still going to die in it.”

Looking out into the horizon, all Hyungwon could see was just a continuation of the forest. It looked exactly the same as every _other_ section of the forest. “I lost the direction we needed to go,” Hyungwon realized, the sun dwarfed by the tall trees.

To which Minhyuk replied: “Aren’t you supposed to be the competent one? Isn’t it your _job_?”

“My job isn’t to be able to track direction using the pathway of the sun, surprisingly enough,” Hyungwon replied, frowning.

Minhyuk’s eyes narrowed. “You know, Hyungwon, you’re-” He broke off, turning away. “Whatever. Let’s get going.”

But Hyungwon had a very good idea of what Minhyuk was about to say and he was in the mood to _fight_ , and if Minhyuk wanted to, then by all means.

If Hyungwon was going to get sued for everything he owned, and spend his late twenties behind a jail cell, the memory of yelling in Minhyuk's face would be the last pleasurable thing he experienced.

“Fucking say it.”

Minhyuk turned around. “Seriously?”

“Say it.”

There was a snarl in Minhyuk’s words. “Fine. You know what, Hyungwon? _You’re bad at your job_.”

And Hyungwon decided he knew absolutely nothing about anything, since of all possible things Minhyuk could say, he did not expect _that_. “What?” he choked out.

“Yeah? There I said it. You’re bad at your job!” Minhyuk was screaming now, and it was clear he was enjoying this more than Hyungwon thought it would.

Hyungwon’s eyes widened. “I am not bad at my job. How dare you? I was the star travel agent at Getaway ever since I got the damn job in university! That company keeps me on a leash of golden studs because they’re so desperate to have me. My boss treats me like his damn son, he gives me gummy bears every time I smile at him! They’d give me free blowjobs weekly if it wasn’t illegal. I have received employee of the month so many times they’ve just framed a picture of my damn ass!”

“...Did they really?”

Hyungwon deflated. “No. They didn’t. Getaway doesn’t have employee of the month. But if they did - _if they did_! That would be my ass.”

Minhyuk snorted, waving a hand scathingly. “All of this is irrelevant, Hyungwon, you aren’t a fucking travel agent anymore, you’re a _tour guide_ , and a goddamn shitty one at that. The only reason you even remembered my name is because you decided to stalk my Instagram!”

“Stop bringing that up as some kind of evidence, I can’t go back and stop myself from being thirsty!”

In hindsight, Hyungwon would have chosen a thousand different responses than ‘thirsty’, but he supposed, the truth would set you free.

Minhyuk didn’t even notice. “You didn’t even know Changkyun’s name until I flat-out told you, and you’ve been mixing up Hoseok and Hyunwoo this entire time!”

“Well, they both have H names-”

“So do you! I know yours and Jooheon’s name from the moment I booked the tickets! But forget us, you don’t need to know us, at the end of the day, we don’t really matter. Why the fuck don’t you know _anything_ about Botswana?”

And Hyungwon was finally rendered speechless.

Minhyuk was fuelled by this and set his face into a derisive grin. “Glad you're starting to realize! You're a fucking horrible tour guide and it's got nothing to do with the fucking hijacking.”

Hyungwon attempted to recapture the threads of his thoughts. “I'm trying my best, I'm sharing what little resources _I_ have with you.”

Minhyuk raised an eyebrow. “I’d debate the ‘sharing’ but still, are you really doing it for me?”

Hyungwon's jaw hung open. “Who the fuck else am I doing it for? Certainly not the goddamn baobabs!”

“Have you ever asked, even once, how I'm feeling?” Minhyuk asked.

“I’m not your therapist!”

“I looked down the barrel of the gun!”

“So did I!”

Minhyuk's face scrunched up in anger. “I was labelled as too stupid to competently rob!”

Hyuk really did that, didn’t he? Minhyuk just sat there, dumbfounded. Hyungwon couldn't stop his face from breaking into a grin, that split-second before a laugh - and by the time he restrained himself Minhyuk had already seen, and his brows were furrowed in anger.

“You see! It’s a fucking joke! I am the joke! I told him to his face ‘you aren’t supposed to’ when he tried to rob me!”

“You were probably just in shock,” Hyungwon said, in an attempt to placate the angry redhead in front of him.

This was of course, entirely the _wrong_ thing to say.

“Probably?” Minhyuk echoed.

Oh no. Hyungwon tried to subtly take a step back.

“ _Probably_? So you agree? There’s some possibility that maybe I wasn’t in shock I’m really just _that_ incompetent?”

Well, yes. “I wasn’t exactly particularly useful, either. I asked for my fucking dufflebag, which was _insane_. It worked out, but still - he could have just shot me in the face instead.”

Again, Hyungwon felt like his attempts at calming him down were just making things worse. Minhyuk pointed to the dufflebag accusingly. “That _fucking_ thing with its dumb fucking joke about emotional baggage, of all things! Of _all_ things, you were concerned about your goddamn suit?! He could have literally killed us both and all you cared about was getting a little sweaty under some sparkly satin!”

“I wasn’t… I wasn’t thinking!” Hyungwon said, flushing.

“Evidently so! And of all the goddamn luggage, you picked your duffle bag, with it’s fucking shorts and crackers!” Minhyuk scoffed. “We could have had my bag, with all the marshmallows, or Kihyun’s with the sex toys or fucking Hoseok’s with the wedding ring, but no we ended up with _your_ manpurse.”

Hyungwon bristled at the implication that his duffle bag was a manpurse, because he had _actual_ purses, and they were far nicer than this ratty bag he dragged to the airport - but he caught on two words. “Wedding ring?”

Well, his mind flickered to the sex toys at first, but the purpose of those felt fairly self-evident.

The colour seemed to drain from Minhyuk’s face. “Fuck. Fuck. Forgot I said that. You absolutely have to fucking forget that. Like. Now.” He paced in a circle. “Oh fuck. He looked for that ring for so long, he wanted it to be perfect, and now it’s gone, God knows where, oh god, he’s gonna _kill_ me when he finds out the ring’s gone.”

Hyungwon’s eyes widened. Hoseok was that buff guy, the one who kept crying, wasn’t it? “Oh my god, there was a wedding ring in that suitcase wasn’t there? He was going to propose to that girl who didn’t come with… Soyou?”

Minhyuk was expressionless as he stared at Hyungwon. He could practically see the way Minhyuk's mind was choosing his words, very carefully. “I misspoke. I meant Hyunwoo. But yes. Hoseok was keeping the ring for Hyunwoo. You can’t mention this to anyone. Obviously, it’s an uncomfortable situation now, as she dumped him, right when he was going to propose.”

“That’s… awful.”

“It is. So we should never mention this. Out of respect for his pain. Now he won’t be able to get a refund on the ring, so he’s broke and single.”

There was _something_ off about the way Minhyuk was talking but Hyungwon could not begin to understand why. If Hyungwon didn’t know any better, he’d swear he was lying- but what _did_ Hyungwon know? Apparently, nothing.

“That’s really unfortunate to hear,” Hyungwon eventually said. “But, I mean, at least they’re sitting comfy at the campsite right now. At least they aren’t in danger of dying.”

Hyungwon suddenly felt a pang of emotion in his chest at the thought of Jooheon. He _missed_ Jooheon. He missed seeing his coworker and being able to confide in him, to have some sort of grounding in reality with him.

And Hyungwon looked up at Minhyuk, clearly a person who thrived in social situations, and felt something like _sympathy_ at the thought of how much he must miss his friends. If Minhyuk despised Hyungwon as much as this conversation had proved, then Minhyuk must really have been suffering. And, honestly, if this was the worst of his rage, Hyungwon just felt sorry for putting him in this position.

Well that’s great. That burst of anger lasted a solid ten minutes before Hyungwon just felt _bad_ for him.

“We’ll see them again soon,” Hyungwon said, awkwardly holding out his hand in a thumbs up, and instantly regretting it.

“Who?”

“Your friends.”

“Oh, yeah. Them. Yeah, we definitely should.” Minhyuk paused. “Do you think we’ll ever find the luggage again?”

“Decidedly no.”

If Hyungwon was Hyuk - and he really wished he was - he’d be pawning off Hyunwoo’s lovingly chosen wedding ring and taking the first airplane out of this hellhole.

“Yeah, thought as much,” Minhyuk said, sighing. “Hyungwon, I’m tired of arguing. We don’t have enough water for this. Can we just… pause?”

“We could just stop arguing,” Hyungwon replied.

“Well, you could apologize for being a horrible employee, and just an unpleasant person.”

“And you could just like, go die?” Hyungwon couldn’t stop the words and bit down. “Sorry.”

Minhyuk stared at Hyungwon in disbelief, before a ghost of a smile appeared on his lips.

“Pass a saltine and we'll call it even.”

 

The sun had passed even further, and they pressed further into the forest, Hyungwon wondered if when he got back, ladies would faint in the streets at his calves of steel. Pausing for a moment to rest against a tree, having more than reached his recommended step count by his Fitness app. Hyungwon removed the dufflebag from his back and took out the bottle of water. He swirled around the pathetically minimal amount remaining, drank less than half of it, and tossed it to Minhyuk.

The water was warm, and stale, but if it didn’t feel _good_ to feel something other than the dryness which permeated the air.

Minhyuk's eyes widened. “Are you sure?”

“What’s the point, Minhyuk? I’m thirsty, and you are too,” Hyungwon said, and cringed at his own choice of words.

Dehydration made him merciful, and Minhyuk just gulped the rest of the water, swirling it around, and sighed when the bottle was emptied.

“I guess water is our priority now?” he said, tossing the empty bottle back.

“Yes. It’s probably more likely we’ll get to some sort of lake than before we get to the campsite,” Hyungwon said, packing the dufflebag up when Minhyuk halted him.

“It’s fine. I’ll carry it for a bit. You’ve had it this whole time.”

“Oh, I can’t expect you to…”

“Don’t worry about it,” Minhyuk chirped. “You deserve a break.”

It was far too out of character for Minhyuk to act so polite, and Hyungwon had an inkling he may have been feeling slightly guilty for calling Hyungwon incompetent. Still, Hyungwon wasn’t about to refuse such an outright offer to help.

The water, however little, seemed to revitalize them and when Minhyuk began to talk, Hyungwon actively participated.

Hyungwon, who had felt his mind weigh down with the worry and guilt the entire walk so far, breathed deeply. Hyungwon breathed deeply. “Minhyuk. I just… wanted to say I’m sorry.” He hadn’t even considered how much of this whole situation was his fault, and now he couldn’t erase it from his mind.

Minhyuk stopped mid-stride and looked behind him. “What?”

“I’m… sorry. For being a terrible tour guide and getting us in this position, because it’s at least partially my fault.” He paused, trying to force the words out. “No, it’s mostly my fault. I wasn’t good at my job, I wasn’t even doing my job, and I’m sorry for putting you in this position.”

Minhyuk blinked rapidly. “Oh. Wow. Uh, thanks. That must have been difficult.”

“Extremely so. But, I’m trying to be sincere. I’m sorry, Minhyuk.”

A genuine smile crossed his face. “It’s okay, Hyungwon, I know you didn’t intentionally plan this. We’ll make it through. I’m sure we will.”

The dark cloud which had seemed to follow Hyungwon seemed to dissolve. They continued on, and the air seemed so much lighter when it wasn’t thick with tension.

 “So, a travel agent, right?” Minhyuk began. “That must be cool. Have you travelled a lot?”

“Uh. Not at all.”

Hyungwon could appreciate the attempt at friendly conversation, but he couldn’t help but wish it was the other way around. He wasn’t particularly skilled at smalltalk, and didn’t want to accidentally reveal something embarrassing or potentially legally threatening.

“Have you gone anywhere recently?”

Most recently would be the Booze Cruise of 2014, which was a memory he would prefer to purge from his mind, ideally with bleach, but fire would suffice.

 “I just book other people’s holidays. I’m not one for the budget kind of vacations.” Hyungwon immediately realized the offense in the statement. “Uh, not that there’s anything wrong with that. I just like my luxury.”

“Oh, same,” Minhyuk replied. “Do you think it was my idea? I’m more of a bodybag than a sleeping bag guy – and that’s only because it would be against my will.”

“But… you booked this budget holiday, didn’t you?” Hyungwon asked.

He remembered _that_ much from the briefing.

Minhyuk scowled. “I mean, _technically_ , yes, but that’s because half of my friends are broke, and the other half couldn’t decide on something. You know how a compromise is something that everyone can agree on? This was the opposite. This was just so we didn’t end up spending our vacation at home like _every_ year.”

Hyungwon raised an eyebrow. “What did you want out of a holiday?”

“A luxury penthouse suite,” Minhyuk murmured, lost in thought. “It would have been _beautiful_. I could have spent all day in the sauna, followed by the pool, followed by the spa.  But, no, _he_ had to come and talk about how he had no money because he spent it all on a ring and ‘no Minhyuk, we can’t go to Malta, that’s too expensive, cancel the five star hotel’.”

“Poor Hyunwoo,” Hyungwon said, frantically hoping he got the name right.

Minhyuk looked at him for a moment too long and nodded. “Yes. Hyunwoo. That’s right,” he sighed. “It was just so _cheap_ , Hyungwon, and our friend group hadn’t done anything besides go to the same bar every weekend for the past year.”

Something strange settled in Hyungwon's stomach as Minhyuk referred to his friends as ‘ours’. He obviously wasn’t referring to Hyungwon, but part of wished he was. Just to have that sense of unity, a ‘squad’ of sorts – if that’s what the youth still called it. Hyungwon would never admit it, but sometimes he wished that he had friends to go on a holiday with instead of a string of casual colleagues and League of Legend gamertags. 

“But, enough about me. I wanted to ask how you became a travel agent.”

Hyungwon's expert distraction techniques had regrettably failed. “Uh, I was at university. And my future boss, Mr Kim, saw I was top of the class and asked me to be an intern at his company, and I told him I had a driving lesson the day of the interview and couldn’t make it, and then he told me he’d give me a company car if I graduate and work for him.”

Minhyuk whistled. “Damn, were you that good?”

“I think I was just tall,” Hyungwon said, thinking seriously. “Mr Kim apparently had some interesting selection criteria with his employees.”

“So, you just were an intern, and you stayed with the company? All this time?”

“Well,” Hyungwon said. “He did give me the car.”

Hyungwon hadn’t ever sat down and thought about too hard about the steps that led to his career and having to list it out sequentially, he realized how little of it involved active choice on his part. He just kind of, went along with the path his life took with very little diversion.

 Truthfully, he liked the security. While his university friends had fretted over jobs and internships, Hyungwon drove himself to his senior year finals in his company car. It was _nice_ to be viewed as so valuable that his boss invested so much in a student _._

For a while, there was only the sound of footsteps, until Minhyuk attempted to restart the conversation again. “Do you like being a travel agent?”

“I loved it. Then they… made me _this_ ,” Hyungwon said, kicking up some sand dramatically. “I just wanted a desk job. I was _happy_ with my desk job. And then my boss just decided to restructure the company, and had the idea that I needed to be out on the field, making _connections_.” Hyungwon turned to Minhyuk. “Will you ever travel with Getaway ever again?”

“No,” Minhyuk said, smiling gently. “But that might just be because we never get out of here.”

At least he was honest. Honesty was all Hyungwon could hope for anymore. That, and water, and food, and perhaps a search and rescue team.

“Hyungwon, unrelated question, but while I was looking for the water this morning I saw-”

And Hyungwon's mind began short circuiting because _the can of dry shampoo_ , the _dented_ one, the one from the bathroom conversation he wasn’t supposed to _hear_. Oh god, and they were getting along so well…

“You have shorts? In your bag? Why don’t you wear them? Like, no offense, but you must be dying in that suit?”

Hyungwon exhaled deeply. “Oh. Yeah. The shorts.”

The truth of that particular matter was perhaps more embarrassing. Hyungwon may have been called ‘vain’ a few times, and while he prided himself on his face and his diet, the matter of his knees was another matter. The plane was awkward enough, and the knowledge that Minhyuk would _absolutely_ comment on it. Again.

Minhyuk continued look at Hyungwon for an answer, who desperately attempted to find one that wasn’t ‘you’ll make fun of my knees and it’ll make me upset’.

“I… really need to wash those first. They’ve got all sorts of stains on them.”

“But how? You just wore them on the plane?” Minhyuk asked.

“Uh. I spilled… wine on it,” Hyungwon said, his mind filling with thoughts of Changkyun and his incident.

Hyungwon could _see_ the exact moment the thought entered Minhyuk's head, and by that time, it was too late to try and think of another reason.

“When did you have wine? I was with you the entire time.”

“While you were sleeping,” Hyungwon said, realizing he had gone too far, there was no way to recover from this, he’d just have to accept his destiny as the drunk tour guide.

“You got… _that_ drunk?” Minhyuk was aghast. 

“Turbulence.”

“There wasn’t any turbulence, Hyungwon. We were on the same flight.”

Hyungwon wondered if they’d force him to go to Alcoholics Anonymous meetings when he gets back home. Maybe he belonged there. In some abstract way, it was alcohol to be blamed for this mess. After all, his mother _did_ meet his father at a bar. Granted, it was a juice bar, and at an aunt’s wedding, but that didn’t stop the curse and the fact that without the effect of poorly-made nectar, Hyungwon would not exist.

“Ugh.” Hyungwon scowled as his shoe got caked in mud on a patch of deceptively looking grass. “Great.”

Minhyuk looked down at his shoe, his eyebrows raised quizzically. “Is that… mud?”

“Well, I hope it isn’t anything worse.”

“No, no, if it’s mud, that means…”

Hyungwon had absolutely no clue where Minhyuk was going with. “Is it some kind of expression? Like step on a crack break your mother’s back? I’m not sure.”

“Water! Hyungwon! If you’re complaining about your shoes being muddy, there has to be some water nearby!”

Minhyuk pushed past him, knocking Hyungwon off balance, and ventured off into the trees with more determination than he’d seen before. It couldn’t be, Hyungwon wasn’t _lucky_ like that, they weren’t just going to _find_ water.

Regardless of whether Minhyuk was hallucinating or not, when the realization finally hit Hyungwon that his companion had disappeared into the overgrowth of trees, he attempted to follow him, but quickly found himself lost in the canopy. Minhyuk had about a _minute_ head start, where could he have gone?

“Minhyuk?” Hyungwon called, soft and awkward at first, but then louder. “Minhyuk?” He was _not_ about to lose him - for one, two people could take on a potential tiger attack better than one.

Minhyuk’s voice sounded out: “Over here! There’s actual _water_.” And then: “Are you lost? Did you seriously get lost about ten meters away from me? God, no wonder we’re in this mess.”

Not for the first time, Hyungwon _really_ thought he deserved better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> can I just say that I somehow predicted Minhyuk going to the jungle some several months before it even happened??? because that ACTUALLY HAPPENED, incredible, i wonder if anything else from this fic will come true
> 
> anyway have a good day <3


	5. Detour

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> LOCAL TRAVEL AGENT GETS STUCK IN RAIN WITH ANNOYING MANCHILD: What Happens Next Will Warm Your Heart!

“It’s actual _water_ , I didn’t even think it existed anymore,” Minhyuk murmured reverently, crouched at the edge of the river. “I’m gonna take a fucking _bath_ , I haven’t showered in at least a week.”

“We’ve only been out here two days.”

Minhyuk looked at Hyungwon, his head tilted to the side. “And?”

Hyungwon mentally made a note to never _ever_ have any physical contact with Minhyuk ever. “Before you jump into a river headfirst and cleanse your foul-smelling body, let’s just think about this logically. We need to keep all dirt downstream, otherwise we’ll risk contamination-”

Hyungwon gave up mid-sentence, nearly collapsing to his knees. The source of the mud was a rather small river, but flowing with the _purest_ water Hyungwon had seen. He splashed water on his face, whimpering softly at the relief. Then, attempting to regain what left of his dignity, he smoothed out his blazer.

“I’m serious, Minhyuk, we can’t ruin the water, it could have serious ecological impacts that could devastate the entire region,” Hyungwon says, attempting to shed his soulless corporate image. It seemed futile, ultimately, it’s not like Hyungwon had a soul to begin with.

Minhyuk, who already had his shirt off, nodded. “Oh yeah. Definitely. Ecology? Yeah I care about that - I love fish. I’ll just jump in a few meters down, won’t harm anyone. Promise.” He looked down with disdain at the sweaty T- shirt in his hands, and it caught on a rock as he carelessly tosses it in the river.

Hyungwon was trying really hard not to stare, but Minhyuk was literally walking in _front_ of him, half-naked and Hyungwon couldn’t deny he was at least, like, 2% attractive. He wasn’t nearly as skinny as he seemed to be. Minhyuk was actually kind of… muscular. Hyungwon averted his gaze, fixing his eyes on the the river.

“Uh, I’ll let you get cleaned up. I’ll do other things while you clean up, uh, and I’ll do those things... somewhere else so you can have your privacy.”

“You don’t have to run away into the shadows, Hyungwon,” Minhyuk said, voice thick with amusement. “It’s not awkward.”

Hyungwon would strongly disagree, and the fact that he said it was not awkward, just made it _more_ awkward. It was just a matter of refilling the bottle and walking away - but Hyungwon made sure he was still in earshot of Minhyuk’s splashing noises. If there was one person who’d escape a slow death by dehydration and then just end up conking out after hitting his head on a rock, it would most likely be the man currently in the river.

The water slithered down Hyungwon’s throat soothingly and he let out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding. The shade of the tree gave little protection against the sweltering heat, but frankly, Hyungwon didn’t really care.

He was relieved that he found water, he was reasonably certain _that_ was the emotion he was feeling, but he would have loved having confirmation through a chart or graph. Water was a good thing. Water was a sign they’d survive through the week at least. Perhaps they could travel along the stream and attempt to find a village or a town, if looking for the campsite just proved impossible.

But the anxiety that came with the discovery of the river was the worry of how much longer were they going to be lost?

As if sensing a disturbance, Hyungwon glanced behind him for a moment, the splashing having decreased in frequency and saw a flash of red hair under the water, a soft giggle emitting, and a smile unconsciously crossed his face.

In a way, his entire future rested on Minhyuk's life and it’s quite likely he could go to prison because of him - but he did have a giggle that was a welcome sound. Hyungwon then decided he was delirious and banished the thought. He opened his forgotten and entirely useless cellphone, which informed he had reached critical battery level.

“What are you doing?”

Hyungwon nearly jumped back, hitting his head on the tree he was leaning against. It was Minhyuk, of course it was Minhyuk, who else would it be? He was still in the river and from the quirk of his head, apparently in the mood for conversation. He looked almost mermaid-like, just a show of wavy red hair, muscles and crystal clear water surrounding him.

“I’m checking how much battery I have left. What are _you_ doing?”

“I just wanted conversation,” Minhyuk said, framing his face, splashing water. Well, at least Hyungwon was beginning to understand how he worked.  

“Aren’t you supposed to be at _that_ end of the river? Do I have to go into the finer nuances about disrupting ecosystems again?” Hyungwon said, hoping he wouldn’t have to because he really didn’t know the finer nuances about disrupting ecosystems.

“That’s kind of hypocritical considering who you work for.”

“I recycle,” Hyungwon protested. “Glass too!”

Minhyuk pushed himself up further towards the edge of the river. “And I’m clean! Really! And I washed my clothes.”

Great to know the man who doesn’t shower finally purged his flesh of its soiled state. Hyungwon raised an eyebrow. “Do you, like, want a prize? Get out, you’re not the only one who needs a bath.”

Minhyuk shrugged. “The water’s so good, I’m thinking later we should just swim.”

The last time Hyungwon swam was on a forced family trip to the beach at the age of nine. He got sand in his toes and cried. It wasn’t a good time. “Minhyuk, this isn’t a vacation.”

“I mean, technically it is,” Minhyuk said, an annoying grin on his face. Or maybe it was his face in general that was annoying. “For me, anyway. You can go file a report and write a meeting summary while on a plane.”

“Is that what _you_ think my job is- oh, nevermind, just get out.”

Hyungwon tossed Minhyuk the bottle of water, and walked to the edge of the river. Shooing Minhyuk into the trees with aggressive hand gestures. When he was sure of his privacy, he peeled off the layers of clothes which clung to his sweaty frame, and the moment he submerged himself into the water, he thought it as close to a religious experience as possible and moaned in delight.

“You know, you told me off for washing my clothes, yet you’re the one jacking off in the river,” Minhyuk called, from somewhere obscured in the trees.

Hyungwon flushed. “It was a sigh of _relief_. Get your head out of the gutter.”

“Whatever, man, I’m not here to judge. Just think of the fish.”

The water was perhaps slightly too warm, but it was _soothing_ , and Hyungwon felt himself wash off about a year’s worth of grime and dust that settled on his skin. He threw in his suit as well, and not willing to expend the effort to wash it, just letting it fester on the surface of the pond, the bright red colour appearing as if the river was bleeding.

Hyungwon's eyes fluttered closed and he allowed himself a moment of peace, before the inevitable moment where he’d have to start walking again.

 

It was startling the change that a single bath had on Minhyuk. He borrowed – without asking - Hyungwon's hairbrush, and untangled his hair, and resembled the Minhyuk from his Instagram pictures, that effortless beauty coupled with the charisma. Thankfully without the overuse of emojis.

It was terrible. It was easy to ignore how attractive he was when he was scowling like a toddler and caked in dirt, less so when he looked like he had just come from a spa day.

And Hyungwon, who had about two fucks to give and had no hair gel, was just _there_ with his knobbly knees. It was demotivating to say the least. Despite his reducing self-esteem, Hyungwon did cave in and wear the shorts – the sight of the red fitted pants was too detrimental to his fragile mental state.

Anyway, hopefully Minhyuk wouldn’t notice as he’d be so preoccupied with the river.

“Oh, you’re wearing the shorts! You have such cute knees.” He positively _beamed_ , kneeling down to get a better look.

Hyungwon replied with, “go fuck a tree.”

Minhyuk blinked. “That’s not something I’ve heard before, and not something that I think is physically possible.”

“You’ll never know unless you try.”

The sun dimmed below the canopy of trees, and Hyungwon sighed at the prospect of another night on the ground. His back, the poor broken ruins of his spine would never recover. “I assume we’ll stay here for the night.”

“You mean we plan to leave the river?” Minhyuk asked, tilting his head to the side.

“We can’t stay here forever. For one, we’ll be out of food by like… tomorrow morning. Secondly… we don’t _live_ here. Let’s not get complacent. We have water. That’s it. You’re still gonna sleep on the _ground_ tonight.”

Minhyuk didn’t seem fazed in the slightest. “It’s better than where we were just a few hours ago. I call that a success.”

“You’re sleeping on _dirt_.”

“A success!” The sunniness exuded out of his like literal fumes.

Hyungwon decided they had very different definitions of success.

Even though his standards were low, Minhyuk did have a point – their position was much better than just a few hours ago, even if they were still as hopelessly stranded as ever, and that was worth celebrating.

“We should get moving early tomorrow,” Hyungwon finally said. “Sunrise, I think. I’ll split us some crackers for dinner and we should call it a night.”

“I can’t believe you really make me go to sleep at like seven. Even my bedtime in primary school was later than this,” Minhyuk grumbled, sitting next to Hyungwon.

“You don’t _have_ to sleep now,” Hyungwon reasoned. “But what else do you plan to do? And before you say anything, we are _not_ playing rock, paper, scissors.”

His momentary disappointment quickly left. “Harsh, but fair. Pass me a cracker.”

Hyungwon counted out three for each of them, and handed it to Minhyuk before eating his own. “We should probably make a back-up plan regarding our food situation.”

“Can you hunt?” Minhyuk asked.

“God, no. I could never. The only animals we’ve even seen were birds. I’m not eating a pigeon. Not today, anyway.”

“Well, I can’t either. How are we going to find food, then?”

It was a good question, and it wasn’t one that Hyungwon had an answer for. “Hopefully there’s something like fruit trees around. Otherwise we’re in for a few very hungry days.”

Minhyuk sighed. “We’re really going to die in this forest, aren’t we?”

“It’s definitely a possibility.”

“Keep up that optimism.”

 

“Hyungwon, you need to wake up.”

He let out some sort of grumbling noise, curling his fists tighter.

“That’s not a very good argument.”

“Five more minutes.” The words came out indecipherable.

“Hyungwon…”

Minhyuk was shaking him awake now and Hyungwon cracked his eyes open. “God, what fucking time is it?”

“Sunrise, if that means anything to you.”

“Sunrise is like… 5am. To me, that means: go back to sleep,” Hyungwon said, promptly closing his eyes and falling back on his makeshift pillow.

“Hyungwon, we need to get going.  _You_ were the one who said we should walk early.”

“That was the old me. I don’t know him. I’m a changed person now,” Hyungwon grumbled, reaching into the air, grabbing Minhyuk's arm and pulling him down. Minhyuk squirmed against his chest, and Hyungwon just squeezed him tighter, desperate for just a few moments of sleep more.

“Are you aggressively cuddling me to get me to shut up?” Minhyuk mumbled, his voice muffled against Hyungwon's chest. “This won’t work you know.”

“Shh.”

 

When Hyungwon woke up the second time, the sun had already risen and he vaguely remembered something about ‘getting up early’. Ah, well, not everything went as planned. He also vaguely remembered feeling some lump of warmth cuddle next to him. The two events seemed independent until he looked down at the mass of redhead currently snuggled against him, entirely asleep, and felt his eyes roll back into his head and sirens go off in his mind. There was a half a second moment when Hyungwon kind of, sort of, maybe enjoyed the feeling of Minhyuk coiled in his arms – and then he realized exactly what he was doing. Hyungwon frantically disentangled himself, pushing Minhyuk to the side, who opened his eyes wide, blinking the sleep away.

“What?! What?! Is it a bear?”

“No! It’s not a bear. There’s no bears in Botswana- forget it. I just… when did you get there?” Hyungwon muttered, wiping his eyes.

Minhyuk looked at him curiously. “I tried waking you up, and you literally pulled me down and made me go back to sleep next to you. I attempted to move away and you just nuzzled your face in my hair.”

Hyungwon flushed. “Oh.”

“Yup.”

They stared at each other. “Well, I apologize, nonetheless.”

There’s a sort of fondness in Minhyuk's eyes, but Hyungwon figured that was probably just mucus. “It was kind of adorable, but also terrifying. You were squeezing me like the last bit of tomato sauce in the packet. I was concerned you were going to pop a blood vessel. Or that I would.”

Hyungwon wondered why he was ever let out of the house, let alone the country. He was clearly unfit for human society, he should be one of those bubble people who do nothing but play League of Legends all day.

Then again, he sort of did that already.

“I’m not a fan of early rises,” he said as an explanation despite it not really sounding like one.

“I think I’ve learned that,” Minhyuk said, running a hand through his hair. “The sun is up, already. We’re like… hours behind schedule.”

Hyungwon couldn’t pretend to feel guilty. “It was so good to _sleep_ though,” he sighed, already thinking about the day of walking which awaited them.

“The sky’s really grey today, it’s so humid,” Minhyuk remarked as Hyungwon reached into his dufflebag, and split the final crackers between them. “I wonder if it’ll rain.”

“Uh, I wouldn’t be so hopeful.”

Minhyuk held up the empty packet of saltines, gazing sadly. It was almost as if he hadn’t criticized their taste every time he shoved it into his mouth. “Guess we’re really screwed now.”

Hyungwon wasn’t particularly invested in the conversation. He was still busy with his personal mental torture room for snuggling Minhyuk for a few extra hours of shuteye. Being asleep wasn’t _really_ an excuse. The loss of food was just secondary to Hyungwon's own problems. Sure, he would probably die a slow death of starvation but he could also die a slow death of embarrassment. He mentally pencilled in a freakout about food two hours later, when he could give it the sufficient amount of mental exertion required.

Regardless of his feelings - and Hyungwon had none, he got rid of them when he was fourteen - the act was just _inappropriate_. His poor employee guidelines lay in tatters. What would Mr Kim have said, if he knew?

He looked up, and became quite distracted at the way Minhyuk's hair seemed to sparkle in the sunlight, his face framed by a background of lush greenery.

He looked sort of perfect.

“Is something wrong?” Minhyuk said, looking back, his dark brown eyes burning a hole into Hyungwon.

A part of Hyungwon knew at some point they’d have to address the underlying tension between them - he just didn’t want it to be now.

“No, uh, you’ve just… got a bug in your hair,” Hyungwon said, instantly regretting it.

Minhyuk placidly raised a hand, brushing it through the waves of red and the action should not have looked like it came straight out of a shampoo commercial.

“I can’t feel anything. Can you get it out?”

Hyungwon nodded mutely, rationality found dead in a jail cell at the back his mind. He leaned over, and his hands sunk through the mass of red hair. It _was_ softer than it looked. He became abundantly aware of every point of physical contact he had with Minhyuk, and the way he was so close, he could hear his short intake of breath.

“See anything?”

Oh. Right. The imaginary bug. Hyungwon shuffled his hands around, and pulled back. “Guess it’s out.”

“Thanks,” Minhyuk said, smiling.

Hyungwon was truly fucked.

It was Minhyuk who stood up first, and held out a hand to Hyungwon. “Let’s get going?”

Hyungwon accepted the hand, and instantly regretted it. He was a grown man who’s had actual sex in his lifetime, he shouldn’t be having heart palpitations over a second of hand contact.

“Let’s get going,” Hyungwon repeated, nodding, forcing himself to stop staring.

 

 

Minhyuk wasn’t blind. He wasn’t stupid either. Quirky? Yes. Annoying? Occasionally. But he wasn’t blind, and Hyungwon figured he couldn’t exactly be surprised when Minhyuk stared at him, his face set in a solemn expression and said in a clear tone: “Look. We should talk about the elephant in the room.

It seemed like this confrontation was inevitable.

Taking a moment to rub his temples, Hyungwon nodded. Despite the subject matter, Hyungwon had to be unbiased and attempt to communicate his thoughts as efficiently as possible. The fact was, they had breakfast together already. They knew the stakes. “You’re right. We can’t keep avoiding talking about this.”

Minhyuk blinked, his stride slowing down. “I didn’t expect you to be quite so receptive.”

“Why wouldn’t I be? This is bigger than both of us. We need to talk about it, particularly if our situation is going to continue on indefinitely. We don’t know how long we’ll be out here, and the sooner we talk about it...”

Minhyuk nodded. “That’s really mature of you. I was so sure you’d deny it.”

“Why would I?” Hyungwon asked. “This is a serious issue that I hoped we wouldn’t have to talk about, but unfortunately, we have to. We just need to take a deep breath and say it.”

There was a sharp inhale.

“Cannibalism,” Hyungwon said. “The sexual tension,” Minhyuk said at the same time.

Hyungwon instantly wished he let Minhyuk speak first. Oh, he really, _really_ wished he let him speak first. Oh fucking hell, how he wished he just _let Minhyuk speak first_.

Minhyuk's eyes widened and he slid back. “Did you say…”

“Uh, okay, yeah, let me explain-” Hyungwon began, trying to find a way to word his thoughts without sounding like a serial killer.

“Oh my _god_ !” Minhyuk's mouth hung open. “All those long, lingering looks that I thought were of _lust_ , were because you were _hungry_?”

“No, that’s not what it is at all!” Hyungwon said, frantically. “Not to say it was lust either! They were just _looks_!”

“Have you seriously been thinking about _eating_ me? Minhyuk cried, entirely aghast, his face a mask of horror. “It’s only been like two hours since we ran out of food and you’re thinking about that already?”

Minhyuk's voice was growing louder and louder and Hyungwon could just imagine the entire forest resound with his squeals about being eaten.

“It’s not _like_ that,” Hyungwon said. “You didn’t let me finish!”

“You _really_ considered this, haven’t you?” Minhyuk stepped back, shaking his head. “I cannot believe how mistaken I was. I thought ‘hey, maybe he wants me in his mouth’ not that you were going to fucking chew.”

“Minhyuk-”

“My dreams of asking you to swallow _did not_ mean for it to be your dinner!”   

“Minhyuk, just… shut up for a minute,” Hyungwon said, rubbing his forehead. “I’m not going to eat you, in _any_ definition of the word, nor any part of your body. No swallowing! What I needed to speak to you about was a possibility in which one of us survives and the other doesn’t.”

This seemed to silence Minhyuk, who pulled his knees to his chest. “What do you mean?”

“So far, we’ve assumed that whatever happens to us, will happen to both of us, and while that’s likely, we need to acknowledge a possibility where one of us might… not make it, and the other does. If that’s the case, then it’s worth saying…” Hyungwon paused attempting to find the most diplomatic phrase. “It’s worth saying that yes, if I’m already dead, feel free to eat me.”

“I feel like I’m going to throw up,” Minhyuk announced.

“Minhyuk, control yourself,” Hyungwon chastised. “This is just a formality, okay. It’ll never happen. It just had to be discussed.”

His skin prickled with awkwardness and he stared at the ground. He ran a hand through his hair. As far as conversations go, that was slightly better than the volcanic eruption of Pompeii. “So, are we fine?”

“I mean, I _guess_. But, god, you could have said that in a less cold and clinical way.”

Hyungwon scowled. “Let’s just never get to that point, shall we? Come on, let’s continue walking, this seems like a good end to our break.”

Minhyuk was quiet when he stood up. “So, sexual tension?”

“Keep walking.”

 

“Okay, I have some news, but you need to promise not to yell at me,” Minhyuk began and Hyungwon instantly felt a headache begin to ripple across his head.

Getting along with Minhyuk was proving as difficult as fighting with Minhyuk. The latter meant a lot of dirty looks and snarky comments, which were demoralizing if nothing else, but their newfound friendship meant Hyungwon found himself forced to _care_ about Minhyuk's wellbeing. If Minhyuk were to die, Hyungwon would at least be slightly sad.

“I promise that if I do yell at you, it’s because you deserve it,” Hyungwon said.

Minhyuk held out his hand, and in his palm were several pink berries. “I found food.”

“Minhyuk, don’t be ridiculous. Those have like a 99% chance of being poisonous,” Hyungwon snorted. Children make mistakes like that.

“They aren’t!”

“Look, they might _look_ edible, but you always hear about poisonous berries. Better not to risk it. You can’t _already_ be hungry.”

“No, no, they definitely are edible. I know because I ate some.”

Hyungwon stopped walking and stared at Minhyuk, actual child. “You what?”

“Yeah. Like… hours ago. I remember seeing them before in some movie or something, and I was _sure_ they’re the same… and I was right.”

Slowly, so slowly, Hyungwon looked from the berries to Minhyuk, and then back to the berries. “If I understand this correctly, you digested some unknown fruit based entirely off something you vaguely remember from a movie whose name you can’t even recall.”

“I feel like it was maybe Hunger Games. You promised not to yell.”

“The ones in that movie were poisonous, you _idiot_ ! You could have _died_!” Hyungwon cried, grabbing Minhyuk by the shoulders, desperately trying to shake some sense into him. “Minhyuk, we’re likely enough to die without you poisoning yourself!”

“No, but it’s fine, I’m not dead! This mean they’re edible!”

“ _Minhyuk_!”

Hyungwon dropped his grip and stepped back, breathing heavily. “Oh my god, do you _realize_ you literally could have been dead right now?”

Minhyuk still had the expression on his face as if he didn’t understand anything, but perhaps that was just his face. “I don’t understand anything.”

At least he was consistent, Hyungwon sighed. “Minhyuk, just… don’t eat strange things. Don’t eat any fruit, don’t lick any rocks, _please_. I’m too young to be this grey.”

Minhyuk pursed his lips, a curious glint in his eye. “I didn’t realize I’d worry you that much.”

Oh. That _did_ sound a bit much. “You didn’t… worry me,” Hyungwon was quick to say.

“You _seemed_ quite worried.”

Hyungwon didn’t bother to reply, foreseeing a conversational loop that would just continue endlessly.

“I am sorry,” Minhyuk eventually said. “I didn’t mean to make you panic.”

“It’s fine,” Hyungwon said, figuring it was just more things to tell his future therapist. “But don’t eat any more berries, I’m serious, they might still make you sick.”

He continued walking on but felt a hand brush against his own, and Minhyuk looked up at him.

“I wasn’t really thinking. I really am sorry. Don’t be upset at me.” His voice was so sincere it sent a flash of guilt through Hyungwon. He interlocked his fingers with Hyungwon’s frowning.

“Look, it’s fine. I may have overreacted. I just worry a lot. It’s okay.”

Minhyuk nodded, satisfied, and let Hyungwon's hand drop. “Now we couldn’t have heart-warming moments like this if you ate me.”

“Stop bringing that up,” Hyungwon said, cringing. He looked up at the sky, grey and foreboding, with clouds rolling in. “Do you think it’ll rain?”

“I said that this morning. You didn’t look like you believed me.”

“Well it didn’t _look_ like it would rain then.”

Minhyuk rolled his eyes.

 

“ _Do you think it’ll rain_?” Minhyuk mimicked, shielding his eyes. “Gosh, Hyungwon, I’m just not sure! I know the sky is all grey, and literal water is pouring, but wow, it’s so hard to tell!” His voice continued increasing in inflection. “Guess it looks like it’s raining now, if only someone told me earlier!”

“Shut up.”

“But, Hyungwon, I think it’s _raining_.”

Hyungwon sighed as he covered his eyes. The rain was steadily increasing in volume, and the more they attempted to evade it, the more soaked they were getting.

“We need to hunker down somewhere,” Hyungwon said. “It could rain for hours.”

“Don’t you wish there was a cave or something we could hunker down in?” Minhyuk said. “Why couldn’t we get lost in the mountains instead?”

“ _I_ wish there was a bed and breakfast with clean linen and free Wi-Fi. I’ll settle for a particularly big tree,” Hyungwon replied.

“Oh, like that one?”

Hyungwon wouldn’t pretend to be able to identify types of trees, but the one Minhyuk pointed at was quite the spectacle: a thick trunk, gnarled branches with giant leaves, and a conspicuously dry surrounding grass. If this tree was a person, it would be one of those beefy guys on Minhyuk's Instagram.

Hyungwon ran, splashing water all over his shiny shoes, and rested against the bark, Minhyuk following him.

Light drizzle still permeated through the tree cover – but it was good enough. Anything was better than the humid rain.

Sinking to the ground, Hyungwon wiped his face off. “Fucking hell, what are we supposed to do ‘til the rain clears? It could be _hours_.”

“We could play rock-”

“Don’t even _suggest_ it, or I’ll throw you right back in the rain.”

“Fine, fine, keep your shorts on,” Minhyuk said. He paused for a moment. “There’s other games we could play.”

Hyungwon let his eyes drift close. “Do you think it’s possible to take a nap while being rained on?”

He felt Minhyuk tug on his arm. “No, don’t sleep. I have a game to play. And it’s not rock, paper, scissors.”

Well, Hyungwon was already intrigued. He didn’t really want to sleep in the rain, he was just committed to his aesthetic of sleeping. “Fine. Continue.”

“Have you ever played the Question Game?”

“Minhyuk, you sound like a teenage boy attempting to sext me in real life.”

“Ah, so you have,” Minhyuk said, a grin on his smug face. “Come on, I’ll let you go first, you can ask me _anything_ you want to.”

This was something high schoolers did when trying to navigate the realms of flirting for the first time. This was _stupid_. But Hyungwon was also beginning his journey to accepting that he was stupid. “Were you born annoying or is it an acquired syndrome?” Hyungwon asked, rolling his eyes.

“The former,” Minhyuk replied instantly. “I’m told I drove my old nanny to a career change from caregiver to professional stunt driver.”

Hyungwon blinked, surprised at the answer. “Uh. Alright then. Fine, go ahead. Your turn.”

Minhyuk’s eyes were wide and innocent. “When’s the last time you got laid?”

A groan escaped his mouth. “Seriously?”

Minhyuk's face was a picture of innocence. “What? It’s not my fault you wanted to be sarcastic, you could have asked me _anything_.”

“What’s the penalty for not answering?” Hyungwon asked.

“Sitting in the rain,” Minhyuk decided, stretching out his legs. “And it’s just started raining harder, so it’s really not worth it.”

Hyungwon deliberated for a moment. This invasion of privacy was _unacceptable_ \- but also, Hyungwon didn’t like losing games. He wasn’t ranked in the top 100 leaderboards for nothing. “2014.”

“Dude,” Minhyuk said, staring. “Dude, you’re joking with me right?”

A flush entered Hyungwon's cheeks. “I mean if you want to be entirely specific about getting ‘laid’ as in actual sex, then yes, 2014.”

“ _Why_ ? You look like _that_? Is there something wrong with you?” Minhyuk asked, to which Hyungwon smacked him on the shoulder.

“There’s nothing wrong with me! I just don’t date a lot!”

“It wasn’t meant to be offensive,” Minhyuk pouted, rubbing his shoulder. “I just never expected it. You’re like, a solid eight.”

“I’m a solid _ten_ ,” Hyungwon replied, without any real vitriol. “Anyway, the incident in question left me a little less fond of casual hook-ups.”

“What happened?”

“It’s not your turn. It’s my turn,” Hyungwon replied.

“Then, go ahead.” Minhyuk appeared to be a man who had no fear or limitations.

“When’s the last time _you_ had sex?” Hyungwon asked.

“Three months ago. With my ex. Bad idea. He cut his hair. I realized I only loved him for his hair to begin with. A very disappointing experience, he made me clean up. Now, anyway, what happened in 2014?” Minhyuk answered within a single second.

Hyungwon was expecting as much, but still felt startled the speed at which Minhyuk revealed personal information. “It’s nothing _dramatic_. I was just on vacation. A cruise. With alcohol. A booze cruise. Lots of alcohol, lots of bad decisions, lots of drunken makeouts in the captain’s quarters. Just your casual Friday night.”

Minhyuk does not react to the news in the way Hyungwon expected from him. He doesn’t laugh or make some sort of crude joke or, dare he even suggest it, say “hello sailor”. Minhyuk, instead, pursed his lips and looked upwards, as if recalling something.

“Huh,” he said. “That’s such a weird coincidence. I also went on a booze cruise in 2014.”

Hyungwon felt every nerve in his body scream at him at once. “What do you… mean?” he said, keeping his voice careful.

Minhyuk seemed lost in thought. “I had a buddy. His name was Jackson. He told me about this huge party _on a boat_ and he invited me along. Said there was gonna be good food and good people. The entry fee was like fifty bucks and I had like fifty-five, so I was totally down.”

Hyungwon's entry fee was not fifty. It was sixty, because clearly, Jackson wanted to make a profit. Jackson was an ass like that.

But… the fact remained. Minhyuk knew Jackson. Hyungwon knew Jackson. They both _knew_ Jackson. “We were… we were on the same cruise?” Hyungwon's voice was shaky when he finally said the words.

Minhyuk was staring at him. “I… I guess so. I don’t remember you at all. I probably never even saw you. What were you doing on board?”

Hyungwon cringed as the memory, and the aching memory of the week long hangover came back to him. “Oh, you know, just this and that. I was in my cabin a lot with my paramour for the time. What were you doing?”

There was a sustained pause, and then Minhyuk said: “I fell off the boat.”

Oh. Hyungwon knew who he was. The realization come crashing down to him. “Oh my God. You were _that_ guy? The guy who fell overboard, the one they had to rescue!” Hyungwon gasped. “I remember hearing about it the next day, no one could find the life-saver because someone was using it as a hula hoop. It was such a mess.”

Minhyuk covered his face with his hands, groaning audibly. “God, don’t remind me, it was _embarrassing_.”

“How did you even _end_ up in that position?”

“Ugh, it’s so stupid,” Minhyuk said, scrunching his nose. “I was at one of the bars, and there was this fucking dickhead who kept saying that if the boat were to drown, people who couldn’t swim were gonna die – and I can’t swim! He was probably just being a drunken ass but he was just out there, grinding on a pillar, humping the poorly-lit dancefloor and taunting me, and I just couldn’t deal with it.” He heaved a sigh. “I wanted some air and I went to the deck and it was so slippery… I just… sort of… _fell_.”

The incident clearly left a sore spot on Minhyuk's subconscious and Hyungwon would have wanted to feel sympathy for him.

If it wasn’t for the fact he was beginning to identify the ‘fucking dick’ from Minhyuk's story in a personal capacity.

“Uh, do you remember who this guy was?” Hyungwon asked, his voice devoid of all emotion.

“Not at all, god, I was _so_ drunk and it was fucking dark in there. I know he was an asshole though, and he wouldn’t stop breaking down to All About That Bass.”

Oh. Hyungwon knew that song. He knew that song very well.

“I almost _drowned,_ Hyungwon. Can you believe it?”

Hyungwon had to tell him. He _had_ to tell him, he couldn’t carry that kind of secret weighing down on his mind. This was the kind of closure he _needed_. “Uh, Minhyuk, who’s turn is it?”

“Oh, I got so distracted with _that_ trip down memory lane,” Minhyuk said. “Uh, I think it’s your turn to ask me?”

Hyungwon inhaled. “Would you happen to find it in your heart to forgive me if I told you I was the asshole from that story?”

About twenty different emotions flitted through Minhyuk's face. “You… can’t be. You can’t be the asshole who laughed at me for an hour straight about not being able to swim, all while dancing to All About That Bass? You _cannot_ have made me slip and fall to my _doom_?”

“I… I don’t remember you,” Hyungwon said, rubbing his eyes. “But the song… the dancing… the being ridiculously antagonizing while drunk… it all fits to what I already know I did.”

Hyungwon squeaked as Minhyuk's hands closed around his neck. “I could have died, you _dickhead_!” Minhyuk's eyes were wild.

Minhyuk began to throttle Hyungwon who figured on some level, he definitely deserved this. On another level, he discovered a new kink.

“I can’t swim! I thought I was going to die! Imagine my poor parents finding my body washed up on some beach still wearing an oversized straw hat?” Minhyuk cried. “All because you were being a drunk asshole!”

“Minhyuk… I… can’t… breathe,” is all Hyungwon could manage from Minhyuk’s iron grip. It wasn’t all bad, he supposed, if he suffocated, at least he’s sure he’d be into it.

“Neither could I! I had to spend the rest of the night recovering from all the saltwater!”

“Minhyuk-” Hyungwon choked out, tapping his hands, until finally, mercifully, Minhyuk released them.

“You’re the _worst_ ,” Minhyuk said, crossing his arms. “I _cannot_ believe that we’ve met before, and all you did was almost kill me.”

Hyungwon rubbed his neck, frowning. “I’m sorry, okay. If it makes you feel better, I probably saved your life on this trip. So, now we’re even.”

Minhyuk's eyes narrowed. “I’d hardly call _this_ even,” he said, gesturing to the two of them and the tree.

“Minhyuk, I am really, really sorry, but it was years ago. I’m much less of an asshole now. I still kind of am, but, I’m more palatable now.”

Minhyuk looked ready to disagree - but took a deep breath. The rain continued pouring, and Hyungwon was entirely quiet, letting Minhyuk work through whatever thoughts were going through his head. Mercifully, it seemed like he grew tired of his anger. “Fine. Since it happened so long ago, I’ll let it go. At least you admit to it, I suppose, now I have a name to the blurred, obscured face.” Minhyuk suddenly paused, cocking his head to the side. “Wait, did you get laid before or after you were indirectly responsible for my death?”

Hyungwon was quiet.

“Hyungwon, while I was fighting for my life, were you having-”

Sitting in the rain seemed like a good option around about now. Though, getting hit by a truck seemed like a better option than answering this question. “Yes.”

Minhyuk leaned against the tree. “Incredible. You got your dick wet while I was also getting wet, but in a far more life threatening way. I’m almost impressed.”

“I am sorry.” Hyungwon figured that if he kept apologizing everyday for about a year, Minhyuk would probably forgive him eventually.

“I suppose it doesn’t _actually_ matter. There’s nothing to gain by holding a grudge against something that happened like three years ago.” Minhyuk crosses his arms, glaring. “I still will, though.”

“I fully expect you to,” Hyungwon replied.

This seemed to placate Minhyuk and he finally cracked a smile. “Your turn.”

Hyungwon pursed his lips. “Why didn’t you just block me when you saw me creeping on your pictures?”

A part of Hyungwon knew he had to _stop_ bringing it up, but it was a question that haunted him for so long, and there didn’t seem to be any better time to address it. It just didn’t make sense. No self-preserving adult would just write the incident off as quirk of modern living.

Minhyuk threw back his head and laughed, water droplets shaking from his hair in the movement. “Are you _still_ worried about that? Hyungwon, not to brag but I have like, a few thousand followers. I’m not going to question if one of them decides to analyse my entire online life – I mean, I’m the one who put the pictures up.”

“But then… why did you message me about it?”

“Because your profile picture was cute and you had intense twink vibes and I’m into that,” Minhyuk shrugged. “It’s not that deep.”

"Intense twink vibes" was perhaps the worst descriptor Hyungwon had ever heard someone use for himself - and he once had an ex-girlfriend call him “a bent flagpole at eternal half-mast”. His dick wasn’t that _disappointing_.  

Still, Hyungwon did spend quite a lot of time picking the filter for his profile picture - it was gratifying to know someone appreciated it.

The rain continued pouring, having not ceased for even a brief reprieve, and Hyungwon vaguely wondered if he was going to stay here for the entire night.

“Ooh, my turn,” Minhyuk said, smirking, leaning ever so closely. “Okay, so, out of all my friends, who would you most want to fuck?” He crossed his fingers expectantly.

And without thinking, Hyungwon asked, “Are you included?”

Minhyuk's face broke into a wicked grin and Hyungwon instantly wished he could shove the words back down his throat and then himself till he consumed himself into a ball of nothingness. “Why, yes, I am included.”

“Well… _not_ you,” Hyungwon stammered out, but he knew the damage was already done. He’d already revealed himself, made himself the _fool_ and there wasn’t much he could do about that. Minhyuk continued smirking, looking far too pleased with himself.

“I think that answers everything I could have wanted. Your turn.”

And perhaps because Minhyuk still had that horrible grin on his face, and perhaps because Hyungwon was still incredibly curious, and maybe because the atmosphere was becoming far too intimate too quickly, Hyungwon opened his big mouth and said: “Why are you and Changkyun fighting?”

The smile faded from Minhyuk's face instantly. “What are you… how do you…”

“I overheard you in the bathroom at the airport,” Hyungwon said in a rush.  “I wasn’t intentionally eavesdropping – I just needed to do my hair. But I heard nonetheless. It sounded serious.”

Minhyuk was quiet for about a minute. “That dry shampoo was yours, wasn’t it? I _thought_ it looked familiar but I couldn’t quite place it.”

“It was,” Hyungwon said.

“You’re quite daring to bring something like that up,” Minhyuk said softly. Hyungwon did not reply and he continued speaking.

He considered his words carefully. “Changkyun and I are having a bit of a fight,” Minhyuk finally said. “I keep trying to get him to do the right thing, and he keeps calling me intrusive and telling me I’m not his mother, so it’s not getting anywhere. We barely speak to each other anymore. I had hoped that when we were alone, away from all the influences back home, he may understand where I’m coming from and that I just want to help him. Now I don’t even know where he is. Clearly, no such luck on that front.”

“What exactly happened?” Hyungwon berated himself for sounding like some sort of reporter. “If you want to tell me.”

“Well, I don’t want to be stuck in the rain. I have to follow the rules, now don’t I?” Minhyuk said, humourlessly. All colour seemed to have drained from him as he stared into the distance. “Changkyun dropped out of university. Said that it just wasn’t for him. And, fair enough, he’s an adult, he can make those kind of choices. He’s been living with me since he left the dorms. It’s just…”

Hyungwon hadn’t even realized that Changkyun was university aged. He had just sort of assumed that he was already on his third mortgage and ready to retire to his holiday home in Italy.

Minhyuk suddenly looked a lot _older_ , as he bowed his head, droplets of rain falling from his red hair onto his legs. “He hasn’t told his parents yet, and it’s worrying me. He _has_ to tell them. He’s worried they’re going to freak out, and yeah, they probably will, but he can’t just _not_ tell them indefinitely.”

Hyungwon wondered if he should say something comforting, but he found himself entirely speechless.

“I let him stay with me because he had nowhere else to go, and don’t get me wrong, I love having him as a roommate. He’s very important to me, and I know he only came to me because he trusts me so much. I don’t want to break that trust but…” Minhyuk trails off, fidgeting with his hands. “I’m just worried that staying with me is like I’m keeping him in some sort of bubble. He has no responsibilities or commitments when he’s with me - it’s like a break from reality for him.”

Minhyuk’s eyes widened. “And I’m worried he’s not going to want to go back to his actual life.”

The thing about Hyungwon’s time as a travel agent was that despite it being a job of customer service, he never _interacted_ with customers. They were faceless voices on the telephone, eagerly talking about their holiday plans - they existed for the duration of the vacation and then disappeared from his mind and into a binder. They weren’t actual _people_.

Sure, theoretically, they all had lives filled with conflict and love and difficulties - but that just wasn’t of any concern to Hyungwon. He just had to book a plane ticket. There was no _connection_.

It was an unfamiliar experience to actually _see_ one of his clients in distress for circumstances entirely out of Hyungwon’s control. Up to this point, every negative emotion Minhyuk had could be attributed to the circumstances surrounding them both - this had absolutely nothing to do with Hyungwon, and theoretically, he had no reason to care.

But he did. He just felt so _sorry_ for Minhyuk and a rush of sympathy flooded him. He was an actual _person_ , not just a wayward client.

Minhyuk did not stop looking at Hyungwon. “I’m used to being the fun friend, you know? That wild friend you go to when you want to fuck shit up and have a good time. I’m _that_ guy,” Minhyuk said, gesturing to himself. “Now I’m stuck being the responsible friend, and I don’t know how to handle it. I just can’t help but wonder how angry his parents will be when they find out – because they _will_ find out, and then they’ll blame me. What if their relationship never recovers and they never trust him again? Or trust me?”

Hyungwon weighed his options. He could either embarrass himself by attempting to comfort Minhyuk, or just let him talk himself out until he dismissed his own emotions with a joke.Because that’s the Minhyuk thing to do, he wouldn’t let the atmosphere linger.

But that wasn’t fair on him.

Hyungwon awkwardly extended an arm and threw it around Minhyuk’s shoulder as some kind of gesture of companionship. Minhyuk turned his head, staring at Hyungwon in disbelief, not rejecting the gesture.

“That’s, uh, a really difficult situation to be in,” Hyungwon finally said. “I can see that you care a lot about him.”

A soft smile grew on Minhyuk's face as he settled neatly into the crook of Hyungwon's arm. “I do! I hope he knows that. He tells me that I’m being overinvolved in his life, but it’s just because I’m trying to help. Someone has to look out for him, and I guess that person is me,” Minhyuk paused.

It must be nice caring for another person that much, Hyungwon thought.

“He’s got a _mouth_ on him though,” Minhyuk said, his eyebrows furrowing. “Did you hear the way he spoke to me in the bathroom? That was barely a fraction of what he’s capable. Once he yelled at me for eating all the cereal and I cried for about three hours on the bathroom floor.”

Hyungwon hesitated. “You’re a good friend, Minhyuk. Anyone can see that.”

A genuine expression of affection crossed his face, his eyes lighting up. “Thank you. You’re a pretty good friend, yourself.”

Hyungwon’s mind caught on the word. Friend? They weren’t _supposed_ to be friends. Rather, he distinctly remembered Mr Kim had deliberately said that the tour guides _weren’t_ there to be friends.

Yeah, well, fuck Mr Kim, Hyungwon decided, and not in the way he used to want to. Mr Kim wasn’t the one who had to see Minhyuk's heartbroken expression of confusion as he confessed his problems with Changkyun. Mr Kim was probably sipping martinis with Seungjun right now, talking about how great it was to be in civilization while streaming 1080p Youtube videos. His views didn’t matter anymore.

Hyungwon imperceptibly pulled Minhyuk tighter, resting his head on the other’s.

“If you want to cop a feel, you can go ahead,” Minhyuk whispered, settling deeper into Hyungwon's arm.

“You’re ruining the moment,” Hyungwon whispered back.

“Just an open offer.”

For a moment, it was just silence as they stared out at the rain together. “I wonder where exactly they are,” Minhyuk thought aloud. “I wonder what they’re doing right now. If they’re taking a nap or playing a game or just chatting.”

“It must be nice to be under a roof,” Hyungwon sighed. “It feels like we’ll never get out of here. We walk _miles_ daily, and still don’t get any further.”

“We’ll find them, Hyungwon,” Minhyuk said, smiling. “I’m sure of it. You’ll get back to your fancy company car soon.”

“Fuck the car, I miss my pet fish,” Hyungwon said. “I hope my neighbour’s taking good care of them, they’re the only things that bring joy to my misfortunate existence.”

Hyungwon had seemed to forget that there was an actual person next to him, and when Minhyuk burst out laughing, his whole body shook with glee and Hyungwon found it quite endearing. “I always seem to forget how attached you are to them.”

“They’re wonderful, and if you insult them, I’ll leave you in the woods and never come back.”

“It’s both terrifying and arousing that I can see you’re being deadly serious.”

Hyungwon felt that he was glad to have Minhyuk next to him, as a warm body in the rain, but perhaps just in general – someone to share a pretty terrible experience with.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well folks, we're almost at the end!! i hope you enjoyed the update and let me know what you think, thanks for sticking for this long <3

**Author's Note:**

> you can find me on social media at [tumblr](http://minhyukwithagun.tumblr.com/) and [twitter](https://twitter.com/minhyukwithagun)! comments and kudos are greatly appreciated <3
> 
> p.s chapter titles are based on The Amazing Race segments which is the ultimate guilty pleasure


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